Judge Rules Salvage Company Can Cut Into Titanic Wreck

An underwater salvage firm has been granted permission to cut into the Titanic to remove the ship’s telegraph machine, though several groups including the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration argue the wreckage is a grave site and should not be disturbed. What do you think?

“But you’re allowed to take anything you want from a car crash? How is that fair?”

Omar Lockwood • Aeronautical Plumber

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“If this is true, then what the fuck did I just pay $2 million for at Sotheby’s?”

Sheldon WhitmoreSinkhole Realtor

“Everyone is obsessed with the ocean. Can’t we poke around in the clouds for once?”

Kiera WoodleTrolley Inspector

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