Lawsuit Seeks Human Rights For Chimps

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Borrowing rhetoric from the anti-slavery movement, a lawsuit filed in New York on behalf of four captive chimpanzees seeks to recognize chimps as legal persons with a limited right to liberty, which would prohibit them from being kept as pets or used in biomedical research. What do you think?

“But how else will we know how badly mascara burns your eyes out?”

Megan Kertzner • Vending Machine Coin Collector

"You mean I have to give up Thurston?”

Bob Friedman • File Clerk


“All right, how many bananas do we gotta throw at this to make it go away?”

Ryan Huus • Lifeguard Trainer