MANDEVILLE, LA—Shining his flashlight into the driver’s face and feigning surprise as he “discovered” the incriminating evidence, a Louisiana police officer planted an aborted fetus on a Black suspect whom he subsequently arrested, sources confirmed Monday. “Oh ho, ho, ho! Look what we have here—you mind telling me what this is doing in your vehicle, sir?” said Officer Clarence Philbank, who reportedly silenced the frightened suspect amid his protests that the aborted fetus in the glove box wasn’t his, and then went on to plant additional underdeveloped fetuses in the trunk of the African American man’s car. “Hmm, looks like you got a whole bunch of this stuff in the trunk, too. You do know this is strictly prohibited, right? Things aren’t looking too good for you, my friend. Afraid I’m gonna have to take you down to the station.” According to reports, the officer later claimed the suspect was carrying an unregistered deadly weapon after slipping a speculum into the Black man’s pocket.
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