WASHINGTON—Citing the encouraging trend as evidence that the nation is finally emerging from the financial crisis, a new report issued by the Bureau of Labor Statistics Thursday revealed that Americans are once more squandering their incomes on luxury goods and services at a pre-2008 level. “Our research has found that citizens across every income bracket are frittering away money on smartphone games, high-end exercise clothing, and elaborate espresso machines at a rate we haven’t seen since before the recession,” said lead researcher Nicole Foster, adding that national spending data indicates more Americans are purchasing organic dog treats than at any point over the last six years. “The fact that most Americans are willing to splurge on so many utter non-necessities suggests they feel confident in blowing their paychecks without fear of repercussion.” However, Foster warned that the nation’s confidence in throwing away its money was fragile and that it was just a single economic downturn away from restraining itself all over again.

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