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America's Finest News Source.

Man Arrested After Attempting To Cross Atlantic In ‘Human-Powered Hamster Wheel’

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The U.S. Coast Guard arrested a man trying to cross the Atlantic in a “human-powered hamster wheel,” having found him 70 miles off of Georgia’s coast while Hurricane Franklin headed toward the area. What do you think?

“Everyone wants eco-friendly transportation until it’s time to put your money where your mouth is.”

Randolph Napper, Poultry Trainer

“Men can’t do anything in this country anymore.”

Arthur Mulligan, Unemployed

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“Now we’ll never know what’s on the other side of the Atlantic.”

Darcy Allegro, Backup Clapper