MONTCLAIR, NJ—Emphasizing that the last thing he wanted to do was offend someone in their own home, local man Tyler Fredriksson told reporters Wednesday that he wasn’t sure if his friend’s house was the type where he was supposed to take off his clothes before entering. “Growing up, my family kept our shirts, pants, and underwear on inside, but everyone is different,” said Fredriksson, taking a moment to survey the sweaters strewn all over the foyer before attempting to peek into the kitchen to see if his friend was completely naked or not. “I mean, his place does look super clean, and I’d hate to track stuff over this brand new white carpet with my dirty clothes. Maybe I should strip down to my socks, just to be polite.” At press time, a fully nude Fredriksson had apologized after being informed that the white slippers at the doorstep were intended for him to wear inside the house.
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