LEBANON, NH—Saying he was stunned by the film’s macabre subject matter, area man Tyler Duchesne told reporters Friday that he had never realized The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is actually pretty creepy until he viewed it for the first time as an adult. “Back when I was a kid, it never occurred to me that the movie’s premise of a family of cannibals living in the woods and preying upon innocent passersby is really kind of disturbing,” said Duchesne, who had not seen the 1974 horror classic in decades, explaining that all the stuff about Leatherface butchering his victims with power tools went completely over his head when he watched it as a child. “I was always too focused on the whole plotline of the teenagers trying to find gas for their car to notice that they were essentially being preyed upon by these demented psychos. Man, the more I think about it, the whole idea of a character who wears a mask made out of human skin is a bit unsettling.” Duchesne added that he recently had a similar experience with another film from the early ’70s, noting that in his younger days he had not realized just how tinged with sexual undercurrents Deep Throat is.
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The Onion Film Standard: Oscars Edition