
CINCINNATI—Noting that no one at the party seemed to appreciate all the careful thought that went into his outfit, local man Mark Whitmer told reporters Monday that he wished more people would applaud his restraint for not doing blackface with his prison jumpsuit Halloween costume. “Look, I know some people didn’t like the stereotypical prison inmate costume I wore, but I do think I deserve some credit for not putting any black face paint on my skin tonight whatsoever,” said Whitmer, adding that while he got extremely close to covering his hands, neck, and face in a dark shade of brown, he ultimately opted at the last minute to scale back and just go as a white prisoner instead. “Truth be told, with the costume’s ball and chain and handcuffs, it took almost all of my willpower not to run to the store, buy a curly-haired wig, put on a do-rag, and head straight to the party. But hey, I didn’t do that! I did the right thing, held myself back, and left all the good stuff on the cutting room floor.” Whitmer went on to state that more people also should have appreciated the fact that he spoke in African American Vernacular English the entire night yet only said the “N-word” a few times.