Mariah Spawns Twins

Singer Mariah Carey gave birth to twins, one boy and one girl, on Saturday. What do you think?

"This settles it: She's way better than Whitney Houston."

Max Ferguson • Mine Surveyor


“Those lucky kids are going to get screamed at in octaves most children can only dream of."

Nicki Udhin • Wig Dresser

"That's great news! Now our country finally has something to be happy about."

Harlan Raven • Unemployed


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