MLB Warns Homerun Hitters League Almost Out Of Balls

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NEW YORK—Cautioning players to think twice before taking any more big swings at the plate this season, the MLB warned its home-run hitters Monday that they’re almost completely out of baseballs. “Just so you all know, we’re down to like, 12 balls, so please keep that in mind before you try to crank any more out of the park,” read the league’s official statement released to the remaining four playoff teams, emphasizing that batters will need to change their habits if they want the sport to continue through the end of the World Series. “If everyone could chip in with singles, doubles, or even triples, that would go a long way. ’Cause once we’re out of balls, we’re done.” The statement went on to add that, in light of the shortage, catchers will have to be far less picky about which balls are too dirty to throw back to the pitcher.