Murdoch Buying Dow Jones

Illustration for article titled Murdoch Buying Dow Jones

After years of planning and negotiation, media mogul Rupert Murdoch will be buying Dow Jones and The Wall Street Journal for $5 billion. What changes will he make?

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Illustration for article titled Murdoch Buying Dow Jones

Paper will be given new, harder-hitting title: The Balls-to-the-Wall Street Journal

Full-color Page 3 chairpersons

Personally plans on crashing the stock market so he can start from scratch

Fridays will be casual fact-checking day

Conflicts of interest increased by 380 percent

Market headlines now in 252-point font

Update business card

Will finally bring Broom Hilda back to comics page