NASA Says New Moon Mission Unlikely Since Neil Armstrong Only Person Who Knew How To Get There

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BALTIMORE—Dashing hopes of a return to the Earth’s only natural satellite, the National Aeronautics and Space Administration played down plans for another Moon mission Monday, explaining that Apollo 11 astronaut Neil Armstrong was the only person who knew how to get up there. “Unfortunately, despite repeated attempts to discover Neil’s secret route, we simply never asked him about how he managed to fly all the way to the lunar surface before his passing,” said NASA administrator Bill Nelson, adding that the agency knew that Armstrong “went up in a rocket,” and then really didn’t know anything after that. “Whatever he did seems incredibly complex, to be completely honest. Even his crewmates thought it was impossible. We just trusted him when he first proposed that we launch a rocket out of the Earth’s atmosphere and land on the moon. Boy did that pay off. Unfortunately, though, that knowledge died with Neil.” At press time, Nelson added that even if they knew how to get to the Moon, any attempt would be futile since the keys to the Apollo 11 rocket had been buried with Armstrong.