Nation To Take Five

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Use The Bathroom, Grab A Snack, Meet Back In 5

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WASHINGTON—Unveiling a plan to enjoy a few minutes to themselves before diving back in, the nation’s populace announced its intention Tuesday to take a fiver. “Looks like we’ve got some time to stretch our legs, chitchat, maybe grab a granola bar before we have to meet back here again,” said resident Brett Combs, echoing the sentiment of millions of Americans who pledged to be back in their places at the top of the hour, refreshed and ready to go. “It’s not that long a break, so we’ll probably just check Twitter or send a text, although if we head out right now we might be able to grab a quick cup of coffee at the place around the corner.” At press time, the nation announced its plan to delay a couple more minutes until everyone was back.