Bandai America announced a revamped version of the Tamagotchi, updating the ’90s toy to give the electronic creatures the ability to breed and marry one another through a wireless connection. What do you think?

“Cool! I’m not jealous at all. I’m happy for it.”
Grady Whitworth • Tugboat Captain

“If we allow Tamagotchi to marry, what’s next? A Tamagotchi marrying a dog?”
Harry Blevins • Horse Cop
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“It seems like everyone’s settling down with whomever’s in wireless range except me.”
Abdullahi Peacock • Fish Canner