NEW YORK—In an annual event that many New Yorkers look to with dread and annoyance, the city’s most popular tourist areas were reportedly mobbed this week by thousands of extremely drunken characters who were celebrating Disney Cruise Line’s Fleet Week—a seven-day shore leave in which the characters depart their ships and let loose in the Big Apple. “It’s always total chaos—earlier today, I saw two Goofys spill out of a bar on Sullivan street in the middle of a fist fight, and just a few blocks down, Donald Duck was pissing right into the gutter,” said West Village resident Thomas Edelman, echoing other New Yorkers who reported seeing large groups of characters including Balloo the bear and Princess Jasmine loudly singing “When You Wish Upon A Star” at all hours of the night, wandering into the street, and getting clipped by taxicabs, as well as several eyewitness reports of Chip the teapot from Beauty And The Beast throwing a trash can through a window at Balthazar after being denied entry. “At about 4 o’clock this morning, I woke up to Pumbaa from The Lion King giving some NYU kid a hand job in the alleyway underneath my apartment window. Disgusting.” An NYPD spokesperson confirmed that hundreds of officers are working overtime in an effort to avoid tragedies such as what occurred in 2013, when four of the Seven Dwarves and Cinderella were found floating facedown in the East River.