PLANO, TX—Wrinkling their noses and averting their gazes in revulsion as the pair began their day with a jovial high-five, employees at local data-storage firm Source Solutions told reporters Wednesday how disgusted they were by coworkers Jeff Hutton and Mike Warren, who are said to be getting extremely chummy with each other. “Every time you walk by their desks, they’re both laughing over some YouTube video or engaging in friendly chitchat—it’s the grossest thing I’ve ever seen,” said administrative assistant Kathleen Frankel, adding that the obnoxious duo regularly make plans to grab Chicken BLTs together at Buffalo Wild Wings to talk fantasy football draft strategy, rather than eating alone at their desks like the rest of the staff. “Ugh, they even have their own little inside jokes that they’ve started referencing around the office, like they share some sort of mutually enjoyed connection with each other” Frankel added that the pair’s shamelessly public chumminess was the most nauseating episode the company had endured since their supervisor spent a whole hour parading her new baby around the office.

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