Onion Sports shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in the NFL’s week 14 games.
Raiders at Rams
Raiders: Los Angeles is going to have to scramble if they have any hope of putting together 11 non-injured players to take the field.
Jets at Bills
Bills: Expect Bills fans to be energized after Highmark Stadium passed a new rule to make alcohol sales mandatory after halftime.
Browns at Bengals
Bengals: A devastating Cleveland loss will leave Deshaun Watson wondering what he possibly could have done to deserve this.
Texans at Cowboys
Cowboys: The Texans will quickly learn that the Cowboys match up very well against shitty teams.
Vikings at Lions
Vikings: The Lions have been improving lately, so watch for them to keep this a close, frustrating slog instead of a fun, highlight-reel blowout.
Eagles at Giants
Eagles: Watch for a bored Jalen Hurts to ignore his legs and arms in favor of beating the Giants with his knees and elbows.
Ravens at Steelers
Steelers: Expect Ravens backup QB Tyler Huntley to show why the quarterback job belongs to Lamar Jackson and Lamar Jackson alone.
Jaguars at Titans
Titans: Expect the Jaguars to have difficulty breaking out of a franchise-long slump.
Chiefs at Broncos
Chiefs: Russell Wilson’s attempts at turning Denver’s season around will continue to be thwarted due to the fact that God enjoys watching him fail.
Buccaneers at 49ers
49ers: After losing Jimmy Garoppolo for the season, San Francisco will need to rely on their vaunted defense to throw the ball and hand it off to the running backs.
Panthers at Seahawks
Seahawks: The Panthers could face some difficulties after waiving struggling quarterbacks Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold, and PJ Walker.
Dolphins at Chargers
Chargers: The Dolphins’ game plan is up in the air, but right now the team is downplaying the exploded head Tua Tagovailoa suffered last week against the 49ers.
Patriots at Cardinals
Patriots: Watch for the Patriots to grind out a victory behind a low-risk offense that stands perfectly still waiting for the drive to be over.