Onion Sports shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in the NFL’s week 14 games.
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Raiders: Los Angeles is going to have to scramble if they have any hope of putting together 11 non-injured players to take the field.
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Bills: Expect Bills fans to be energized after Highmark Stadium passed a new rule to make alcohol sales mandatory after halftime.
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Bengals: A devastating Cleveland loss will leave Deshaun Watson wondering what he possibly could have done to deserve this.
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Cowboys: The Texans will quickly learn that the Cowboys match up very well against shitty teams.
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Vikings: The Lions have been improving lately, so watch for them to keep this a close, frustrating slog instead of a fun, highlight-reel blowout.
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Eagles: Watch for a bored Jalen Hurts to ignore his legs and arms in favor of beating the Giants with his knees and elbows.
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Steelers: Expect Ravens backup QB Tyler Huntley to show why the quarterback job belongs to Lamar Jackson and Lamar Jackson alone.
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Titans: Expect the Jaguars to have difficulty breaking out of a franchise-long slump.
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Chiefs: Russell Wilson’s attempts at turning Denver’s season around will continue to be thwarted due to the fact that God enjoys watching him fail.
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49ers: After losing Jimmy Garoppolo for the season, San Francisco will need to rely on their vaunted defense to throw the ball and hand it off to the running backs.
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Seahawks: The Panthers could face some difficulties after waiving struggling quarterbacks Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold, and PJ Walker.
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Chargers: The Dolphins’ game plan is up in the air, but right now the team is downplaying the exploded head Tua Tagovailoa suffered last week against the 49ers.
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Patriots: Watch for the Patriots to grind out a victory behind a low-risk offense that stands perfectly still waiting for the drive to be over.
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