Organized Crime Syndicate Condemned For History Of Nepotistic Hiring Practices

Image for article titled Organized Crime Syndicate Condemned For History Of Nepotistic Hiring Practices

LITTLE ITALY, NY—Barring those without prior connections from coveted job opportunities within the outfit, the Romano family, an organized crime syndicate, was condemned by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission Monday for a long history of nepotistic hiring practices. “After conducting a thorough survey of the Romano gang, we’ve found that nearly all the underbosses have some sort of family connection to Don Luca,” said Mary O’Neill, general counsel of the federal agency, explaining how outside hires are forced to do menial work like make collections or move weight across state lines with virtually no chance of becoming a caporegime or getting a nice piece of the action. “This gross favoritism stretches back decades, all the way back to the old country. No matter how many hits you carry out or bodies you dispose of, your chances of being a made man are slim unless you’re someone’s nephew or you marry a boss’s daughter.” O’Neill then went on to slam the organization for ethnic discrimination as well, citing the fact that nearly everyone in their upper management is a pureblooded Sicilian.