Panda Born At National Zoo

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After five disappointing false pregnancies, Mei Xiang, the female panda at the National Zoo in Washington, D.C., gave birth to a four-ounce cub last night, stunning zoo officials. What do you think?

“May mother and child enjoy many years of being gawked at in a cage.”

Gene Tanchauco • Systems Analyst

“I’ll give a shit once the cub looks cute and furry and not like a wiggling piece of sausage.”

Sage Ralston • Shuttle Bus Driver


“Did it sneeze? Don’t bother me until it sneezes.”

Jayne Caefer • Air-Conditioning Mechanic