Pope Francis has made efforts to modernize the Catholic Church by embracing technology, saying that he would not judge homosexuals, and considering the removal of celibacy as a requirement of the priesthood. Here are some of the other progressive reforms the pope is considering:
- New Bible with stronger female characters
- Cocking mitre slightly to the side
- Embracing more modern contraceptive methods such as pulling out and having sex in a bathtub
- Rebooting Satan with darker backstory
- Concluding every sermon, mass, and blessing with the phrase “But that’s just my opinion”
- Denim vestments
- Replacing cross logo with stylish interlocking “JC” monogram
- Abolishing Catholic Church