Pope Francis Says He Would Baptize Martians

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While delivering a homily earlier this week in which he sought to emphasize the point that everyone has the right to receive the Holy Spirit, Pope Francis said that he would happily baptize Martians if they arrived at the Vatican and asked. What do you think?

“Not surprised, considering he canonized St. Worf earlier this month.”

Reggie Steele • Boardwalk Patroller

“As someone who hates God, I don’t appreciate how fun this pope is. My day has been ruined once again!”

Katherine Paul • Campground Manager


“So this is a big step for the Catholic Church, right?”

Timothy Myles • Unemployed