Fewer than half of Americans get flu shots every year, believing that they’re not necessary or can cause side effects that make them not worth it. The Onion takes a look at the pros and cons of getting a flu shot.
PRO
Already need to go to Walgreens for more Pringles.
Chance to finally feel something.
Reduced risk of transmission makes great Christmas gift for visiting elderly parents.
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Get to show nurse your strong biceps.
Spares you inconvenience of having to wash hands for rest of winter.
CON
Slippery slope to regularly seeking necessary medical treatment.
Shots give ouchies!
Can’t remember if thing with needles phobia or philia.
Hurts romantic chances with Jenny McCarthy.
Feel guilty standing in way of epidemic.