Report: Getting Massages At Airports Apparently Part Of Certain People’s Lives

DENVER—Noting that there were, in fact, several customers at the XpresSpa in the Denver International Airport, sources confirmed Friday that getting a massage at the airport is apparently a part of certain people’s lives. “I guess some people must actively plan that, after they get through security, they’ll set their bags to the side, sit down in a special chair in plain view of others, and receive a 20-minute full-body massage right in the middle of the crowded concourse,” said 34-year-old onlooker Michael Gilbane, adding that it appears to be a normal aspect of particular individuals’ experience to rest their face in a circular pillow while a professional kneads and rubs their muscles in front of a steady stream of travelers en route to their boarding gates or the food court. “Evidently, this is a typical way they choose to occupy their time while waiting for a flight rather than just reading a book or watching something on their laptop. Huh.” At press time, sources concluded that some people seemingly eat at the terminal’s Steak Escape to acquire nutrition.

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