LAS VEGAS—Warning that such individuals were increasing at an unprecedented pace since the team-based shooter’s recent release, a report released Wednesday by the University of Las Vegas Center for Gaming Research found that there are already five million players who are better than you will ever be at Valorant. “Despite the fact this title came out only two weeks ago, our research suggests that you are already so far behind millions of players in both skill and playtime that you will never be able to meaningfully compete in a match,” said lead researcher Marvin Polk of the report, which projects the number of players who have memorized every in-game hotkey and the specific weaknesses of all 11 agents would surpass 10 million by the end of this week alone. “You might be excited to try out Valorant. You might think it’ll be a fun distraction. But you should know that there are a near-limitless number of people out there who will destroy you immediately. You will never be good. You will never even approach being good. And every minute that passes, another thousand people will take up Valorant who will surpass your abilities to the point of rendering the game unplayable.” Polk added that the Center’s advice to all players would be to just move on from Valorant and try to get in on the ground floor of another shooter’s closed beta.