AMHERST, MA—According to a study published Friday by experts who can tell just by looking at you, you have got to be aware that you're a fucking idiot. "You know that, right?" the report read in part, going on to stress that you really ought to see what everyone else sees when they look at your stupid face. "There's really no way you couldn't know, but then again, you're such a giant dumbass that anything's possible." The report concluded that, seriously, if you don't realize it, you'd better get a fucking clue.

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