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Ron Paul Blames Florida Loss On Expensive Advertising Costs Of Poster Board, Markers

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TAMPA, FL—After finishing last in this week's Florida primary, Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul told reporters his poor showing in the polls was caused by the prohibitively expensive cost of the poster board, markers, and tape he uses to create and hang his campaign signs. "It's difficult for us to keep up with the better-funded campaigns and get our message out there when you have to dish out nine bucks or more for an eight-pack of multicolored markers," said Paul, adding that for his campaign, it was simply not financially feasible to use glitter or sparkles to make the posters more eye-catching. "We tried using ballpoint pens, but it took forever to make thick letters. Then we tried switching to typing paper, but it was just too small, and we couldn't fit 'Restore America Now' on there without having to flip over the page and put the last couple letters on the back side." Paul said he decided to suspend advertising in Florida after the black marker stopped working, reportedly because campaign chairman Jesse Benton forgot to replace the cap.