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Sailor Survives 24 Days At Sea Eating Only Ketchup, Seasonings

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Dominican sailor Elvis Francois was rescued by the Colombian navy after he says his sailboat was swept off to sea while making repairs, surviving the 24-day ordeal by eating only a bottle of ketchup and some seasonings. What do you think?

“My God, I hope at the very least it was Heinz.”

Lance Romero, Vestibule Designer

“Big deal, I did that for all of college.”

Ron Cherniak, Chief Bagger

“I can’t imagine someone could live that long without any mustard at all.”

Katie Hall, Office Historian