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Scientists Find Dolphins Only Other Mammals That Jet-Ski For Pleasure

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SOUTH HADLEY, MA—Discovering an astonishing similarity between human and animal behavior, a study published Friday by zoologists at Mount Holyoke College found that dolphins are the only other species of mammal that jet-skis for pleasure. “After years of observation, we feel confident in saying that dolphins do share humanity’s penchant for jet-skiing as a recreational activity,” said lead researcher Professor Jaya Mendez, citing numerous instances of the aquatic species hopping aboard the personal watercrafts and splish-splashing about when there was no apparent biological or evolutionary reason for them to do so. “While we cannot yet say definitively that these marine animals are riding Jet Skis for the sole purpose of having a good time, the seemingly innate desire to hop aboard a Kawasaki and shred some waves certainly bolsters that theory. There have been many documented instances of other mammals, specifically squirrels and bears, commandeering Yamaha WaveRunners, but it remains clear that these were purely primal acts of survival with very little pleasure involved, if any. Dolphins, however, chop it up all summer long, often communicating an echolocated message akin to ‘woo hoo’ to the rest of their pod.” Mendez added that an MRI showed dolphins’ pleasure centers were located inside an area of the mammalian brain associated with tubing.