VENICE, LA—Fourth-generation shrimp boat captain Buford Comeaux said Wednesday that he was wiped out from a 14-hour day spent personifying the human toll of the BP oil spill in the media. "They get me out of bed at the crack of dawn, and they make me do interviews all morning," said Comeaux, 49, who acknowledged he had lost track of how many times he had uttered the phrase 'shrimping is all I know' since the disaster began in April. "Then the rest of the day they take pictures of me staring at my empty trawl, holding my wife's hand on the living-room sofa, or gazing out at the Gulf from the deck of my boat. God, I could just collapse right here." Comeaux reportedly slept heavily for four hours before waking at sunrise so CNN could shoot some B-roll of him walking forlornly down a pier.
More from The Onion