Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

We may earn a commission from links on this page.
Start Slideshow
Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

You might want to erase your browser history, because nothing is a bigger turn-off than reading a list like this. Here are some obvious signs your partner isn’t sexually satisfied.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Moan The Word “Underwhelming” In Bed

They Moan The Word “Underwhelming” In Bed

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Let’s be real, if that’s not your name, you’ve got problems.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Booing

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

We’re not psychologists, but you probably shouldn’t ignore things like booing, jeering, and throwing popcorn after intercourse.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Clearly Communicate That They Are Happy And Satisfied

They Clearly Communicate That They Are Happy And Satisfied

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Great, add “lying” to the list of problems in your relationship.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Close Their Eyes During Sleep

They Close Their Eyes During Sleep

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Oh, so now they need to close their eyes and think about something else during their REM cycles, too?

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Suggestion Box Is Overflowing

Suggestion Box Is Overflowing

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Sure, they’re constructive notes, but there are also so many you don’t even know where to start!

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Mime Holding Baseball Bat And Softly Say “Swing And A Miss!”

They Mime Holding Baseball Bat And Softly Say “Swing And A Miss!”

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Three strikes and you’re out.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Say “Yuck” More Than Usual

They Say “Yuck” More Than Usual

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

It’s perfectly natural to be revolted by sex, but there may be a problem if your partner is verbalizing disgust after every thrust.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Low Feedback Ratings

Low Feedback Ratings

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Averaging one or two stars on your satisfaction survey is a clear sign that your genitals are performing poorly.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Keep Checking Their Watch While Orgasming

They Keep Checking Their Watch While Orgasming

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

It just makes you feel like they’re not really present.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

You Catch Them Making A Sandwich

You Catch Them Making A Sandwich

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

If your partner makes a tuna sandwich in the middle of sex and doesn’t even offer to make you one, they’ve mentally checked out.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Frequently Asks For Sex

Frequently Asks For Sex

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

If they were really happy in the relationship, why wouldn’t they be satisfied with the sex you already had?

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Missing Genitalia

Missing Genitalia

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

If your partner’s genitalia doesn’t even bother to show up to the sex, you know the sex isn’t up to par.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Acknowledge That, At Least By Most Traditional Standards, Brad Pitt Is An Attractive Man

They Acknowledge That, At Least By Most Traditional Standards, Brad Pitt Is An Attractive Man

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

This clearly means they are fantasizing about Brad Pitt nonstop when they are with you.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Only Cum Dust

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Sex is awkward enough without their penis or vagina coughing up a pathetic little plume of dust.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Never Initiate Pushing Your Twin Beds Together

Never Initiate Pushing Your Twin Beds Together

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Seriously, how hard is it to move the furniture twice a year?

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Change Directors In The Middle Of Sex

Change Directors In The Middle Of Sex

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

They can blame it on the studios all they want, but you know, deep down, a new director won’t fix your intercourse.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Frame You For Murder

Frame You For Murder

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

Nobody who regularly climaxes would ever go to this extreme.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

Not Ripping Your Head Off

Not Ripping Your Head Off

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

If your partner hasn’t decapitated you with their razor-sharp forelegs for precious calories that will nourish their young, you probably aren’t hitting the mark.

Advertisement
Previous Slide
Next Slide

They Attempt To Have An Open And Honest Conversation With You About Both Of Your Sexual Needs

They Attempt To Have An Open And Honest Conversation With You About Both Of Your Sexual Needs

Image for article titled Signs Your Partner Is Not Sexually Satisfied

This likely means the relationship is so badly damaged that your only real option is to end it.

Advertisement