Single Parent Wishes She Had Thought Of Abandoning Child First

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HERKIMER, NY—Following the unannounced departure of live-in boyfriend and father of her 2-year-old son, Joseph, Kelly Sperino, 22, told reporters Tuesday she was "absolutely devastated" that she had not come up with the idea of walking out on the responsibility of raising the toddler herself. "To leave your child, to walk out on your own flesh and blood—why didn't I think of that?" the unwed mother asked as she perused the classified ads in search of a second job. "It would have been so easy to say I was going to get a pack of cigarettes and then never come back. I could just kick myself." Sperino added that she was equally impressed that Joseph's father had the presence of mind to clean out the couple's joint bank account before skipping town.