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2003 July
7/30/2003 - NPR Listener Acquires Kick-Ass Tote Bag
7/30/2003 - That Knife Guy From High School Arrested In Knife-Related Incident
7/30/2003 - Man Thinks Receptionist Is Hitting On Him
7/30/2003 - Man Thinks Receptionist Is Hitting On Him
7/30/2003 - Playground Treated To Hot Pug-On-Pug Action
7/30/2003 - Congress Establishes Bill Suggestion Hotline
7/30/2003 - Digital Music Piracy
7/30/2003 - Yearbook Committee Forced To Print Mug Shot
7/30/2003 - Uday And Qusay On Display
7/30/2003 - Genetically Modified Chicken Lays Its Own Dipping Sauce
7/30/2003 - You Shall Make An Excellent Queen
7/30/2003 -
Gigli
Focus Groups Demand New Ending In Which Both Affleck And Lopez Die
7/30/2003 -
Gigli
Focus Groups Demand New Ending In Which Both Affleck And Lopez Die
7/30/2003 - They're Ruining My Favorite Soap!
7/30/2003 - Horoscope for the week of July 30, 2003
7/30/2003 - Adorable Democratic Candidate Actually Believes He Has A Chance
7/30/2003 - Area Man Knows All The Shortcut Keys
7/30/2003 - Least Favorite U.S. Highways
7/30/2003 - Dominatrix Seems Preoccupied
7/23/2003 - Bush Not Heard From For Over A Month
7/23/2003 - Hot New Secretary Of Transportation To 'Shake Up' U.S. Highways
7/23/2003 - LAPD Discovers Hidden Deformed Olsen Triplet
7/23/2003 - LAPD Discovers Hidden Deformed Olsen Triplet
7/23/2003 - Area Man Overly Proud Of Never Wearing Underwear
7/23/2003 - Widower Misses Sex With Dead Wife Terribly
7/23/2003 - Man Trapped Under Boulder Braces For Possible
Good Morning America
Interview
7/23/2003 - Troops To Stay In Iraq
7/23/2003 - Horoscope for the week of July 23, 2003
7/23/2003 - Least Favorite Household Chores
7/23/2003 - In Sex Sales, What You're Really Selling Is Yourself
7/23/2003 - Gazebo Underutilized
7/23/2003 - Sitting Through This Boring Murder Trial Should Be Punishment Enough
7/23/2003 - FDA Approves New Drug For Treatment Of Social Anxiety
7/23/2003 - Man Going To Taco Bell 'With Or Without You'
7/23/2003 - Deficit-Wracked Maryland Calls It Quits
7/23/2003 - Goofy Guy Named Gary Enlivens Otherwise Intolerable Wedding Reception
7/23/2003 - The New
New York Times
7/16/2003 - Unemployed Man Getting Really Good At Unemployment
7/16/2003 - Judge Totally Understands Where Defendant Is Coming From
7/16/2003 - Judge Totally Understands Where Defendant Is Coming From
7/16/2003 - Late-Working CEO Calls Out For Coffee In Vain
7/16/2003 - Pen Pal Becomes Pen Foe
7/16/2003 - Elaborate Sentence Construction Facilitates Omission Of Word 'Boyfriend'
7/16/2003 - Kraft Goes On A Diet
7/16/2003 - Before He Knows What's Happening, Man Belongs To $uper $aver's Club
7/16/2003 - Secretary Of Agriculture Finally Gets Around To Reading
Fast Food Nation
7/16/2003 - Israelis, Palestinians Agree To Share Headline
7/16/2003 - Horoscope for the week of July 16, 2003
7/16/2003 - Sen. Frist Receives High Bid In White House Bachelor Auction
7/16/2003 - A Second Dose of Angels? I Must Be In Heaven!
7/16/2003 - Painting Of Jesus Totally Knows Area Man Is High
7/16/2003 - Bush's African Tour
7/16/2003 - Woman's Body Confusing Jumble Of Celtic, Egyptian, Japanese Symbols
7/16/2003 - Normally I Enjoy Your Pornographic Web Site, But This Time You've Gone Too Far
7/9/2003 - Ask The Back Of A Gourmet Potato Chip Bag
7/9/2003 - Lottery Winner An Inspiration To All Who Play The Lottery
7/9/2003 - Man With Shitty Job Just Doing This Until He Gets Fired
7/9/2003 - Millionaire Thinks Of Self As Upper-Middle Class
7/9/2003 - Midwesterners Descend On Insurance Company's Free Nail Files
7/9/2003 - Woman Seems Too Hot To Be Riding Bus
7/9/2003 - Summer Music Festivals
7/9/2003 - Rice Krispie Treat Eaten In 8" x 8" Square
7/9/2003 - Here Are Reviews Of Some New Shit
7/9/2003 - Insecurities Laid Bare In Wal-Mart Shopping Cart
7/9/2003 - Is The Economy Turning Around?
7/9/2003 - Giant Girl Forces Playthings Cheney And Rumsfeld To Wed
7/9/2003 - Horoscope for the week of July 9, 2003
7/9/2003 -
Shape
Magazine Declares July 'Let Yourself Go' Month
7/9/2003 - Kick-Ass Sales Proposal Written
7/9/2003 - Woman Masturbates To Concept Of Commitment
7/9/2003 - Top Reasons For Retirement, U.S. Carnival Workers
7/2/2003 - Bush Asks Congress For $30 Billion To Help Fight War On Criticism
7/2/2003 - Woman Doesn't Have Single Photo Where She's Not Hugging Someone
7/2/2003 - Security Guard Makes Passing Women Feel Unsafe
7/2/2003 - Soldier Hoping We Invade Someplace Tropical Next
7/2/2003 - Man Who Hasn't Moved In Six Hours Repeatedly Welcomed Back By TV
7/2/2003 -
Newsweek
Editors Argue Over What To Make Readers Fear Next
7/2/2003 - Bowling-Alley Owner Wants TV Ad To Look 'More
Matrix
-y'
7/2/2003 - Pottermania Yet Again
7/2/2003 - Horoscope for the week of July 2, 2003
7/2/2003 - Minister Constantly Mentioning Teenage Son's Virginity
7/2/2003 - It's Not Nice To Be Smarter Than Other People
7/2/2003 - 8-Year-Old Obviously Packed Own Lunch
7/2/2003 - The Affirmative-Action Decision
7/2/2003 - Man Forgets He Has Infant Strapped To Back
7/2/2003 - Wisconsin Has Crush On Minnesota
7/2/2003 - Most Popular Fiddle Songs
7/2/2003 - I Can Beat The Price You're Paying For Sperm