Sitemap
2012 May
5/31/2012 - Team USA Devastated After Home Depot Refuses To Let Athletes Take Time Off For Olympics
5/31/2012 - Southern White Rhinoceros
5/31/2012 - What Are We Failing To Pull Off
5/31/2012 - Ford Assembly Line Foreman Thinking About Asking Out Cute Welding Robot From Work
5/31/2012 - Secret Service Called Before Congress
5/31/2012 - Shadows Meet The Clouds, Gray On Gray, Like Dusty Charcoal On An Ashen Brow, Nation's Poets Report
5/31/2012 - Dylan, Albright, Morrison Receive Medal Of Freedom
5/31/2012 - Shadows Meet The Clouds, Gray On Gray, Like Dusty Charcoal On An Ashen Brow, Nation's Poets Report
5/31/2012 - God Returns From Two-Millenium-Long Vacation
5/30/2012 - The Big L
5/30/2012 - Romney Clinches Republican Nomination
5/30/2012 - Money Man Pulls Even With Black Guy In Latest Poll
5/30/2012 - Would you rather have Money Man or Black Guy as president?
5/30/2012 - Nabisco Tentatively Adds Hummus To List Of Approved Ritz Toppings
5/30/2012 - High Unemployment Rate Linked To One Man With 42,000 Jobs
5/30/2012 - Shrieking Vilsack Wakes From Nightmare About Being Buried Alive By Giant Ear Of Corn
5/30/2012 - Lugar Will Not Campaign For Republican Nominee
5/30/2012 - Florida Residents Pull Together To Plead For More Government Relief
5/29/2012 - Bed Bug Feels Bad For Area Man, But A Bug's Got To Eat
5/29/2012 - Thom Cargill
5/29/2012 - Obama Presides Over Secret 'Kill List'
5/29/2012 - Big 12 Agrees To Annual Bowl Loss Against SEC
5/29/2012 - Your Horoscopes - Week Of May 29, 2012
5/29/2012 - Hey, Everybody! This Cool New Tide Detergent Video Is Blowing Up All Over The Internet!
5/29/2012 - Area Man Winded After Particularly Lengthy Wendy's Order
5/29/2012 - PayPal Now Accepted At 15 Retailers
5/29/2012 - New Desperate Poverty Video Game Blamed For Urban Violence
5/28/2012 - Collective Wisdom
5/28/2012 - Behind The Pen: Collective Wisdom
5/27/2012 - On The Magic Firing Stan Van Gundy
5/25/2012 - Exposed Brick
5/25/2012 - Crayola CEO Presents Jarringly Ambitious 5-Year Plan At Annual Shareholders Meeting
5/25/2012 - Jim Harbaugh Insists Michael Crabtree Has Best, Most Lickable Hands In NFL History
5/25/2012 - The Week In Pictures
5/25/2012 - Solar Plane Makes First Intercontinental Flight
5/25/2012 - NRA Sets 1,000 Killed In School Shooting As Amount It Would Take For Them To Reconsider Much Of Anything
5/25/2012 - NASA Shuttle Bus Delayed
5/25/2012 - $lapping $trangers
5/25/2012 - Why Women's Professional Soccer Failed in the U.S.
5/25/2012 - Nation Mesmerized By Spurs' Dazzling Pass-Screen-Pass-Shoot Brand Of Offense
5/25/2012 - Undercurrent Of Inequality And Fear Roiling Just Beneath Surface Of '50s-Themed Diner
5/25/2012 - Man At Gym Just Watching TV
5/25/2012 - Shane Doan Wins NHL's Byron Pepys Trophy For Tying His Skates The Tightest
5/25/2012 - Spurs/Thunder
5/25/2012 - Michael Phelps Apologizes To Nation After Tasting Subway For First Time
5/25/2012 - Report: 5th Floor A Bunch Of Pompous Dicks
5/25/2012 - Phoenix Coyotes Pretend Homeless Drifters At Greyhound Bus Station Are Fans Welcoming Team Home
5/25/2012 - Friends Of Friends
5/25/2012 - U.S. Cuts Aid To Pakistan
5/25/2012 - Romney To Undergo Gender Reassignment Surgery To Better Connect With Women Voters
5/25/2012 - 10 Ways To Wow Slovenian Philosopher Slavoj Žižek In Bed
5/25/2012 - Wrigley Field Supporters Propose Tearing Down Rest Of Chicago
5/25/2012 - Thomas The Tank Engine A Little Uneasy With His Broad Autistic Following
5/25/2012 - 'Fifty Shades Of Grey' Series Reaches 10 Million Sales
5/25/2012 - Biden To Honor Fallen Soldiers By Jumping Motorcycle Over Vietnam Memorial
5/25/2012 - Local Man Gets Stabbing Right On 47th Try
5/24/2012 - Suspect Arrested In Etan Patz Case
5/24/2012 - Least Popular Hotel Perks
5/24/2012 - Skechers To Pay For Dubious Fitness Claims
5/24/2012 - Visiting Parents Unknowingly Strike Up Conversation With Parents Of Dorm's Blowjob Queen
5/24/2012 - U.S. Census Overcounted By 36,000
5/24/2012 - Quiet Temp Actually Very Untalented Singer-Songwriter
5/24/2012 - Quiet Temp Actually Very Untalented Singer-Songwriter
5/24/2012 - Nation's Cotton Candy Crop Ravaged By Carnival Weevils
5/23/2012 - B
5/23/2012 - Egypt Holds First Presidential Elections
5/23/2012 - Search Crews Continue To Look For Obviously Dead Hikers
5/23/2012 - Memphis Airport Panda Express Takes Over As Nation's Most Depressing Place
5/23/2012 - Kennedy Family Releases List Of Tragic Ways Remaining Members Could Die
5/23/2012 - Catholic Orgs Sue Over Birth-Control Rule
5/23/2012 - Scientists Find Thousands Of Previously Undiscovered Species Cowering In Amazon Rainforest
5/23/2012 - 14 Feelings Hurt In Local Teasing Incident
5/22/2012 - Posthumously-Conceived Children Get No Benefits
5/22/2012 - David Ortiz Claims He Just Saw Submarine In Kansas City Royals Fountain
5/22/2012 - Your Horoscopes – Week Of May 22, 2012
5/22/2012 - Come On! There Has To Be One Person In This Goddamn School Who's Been Molested
5/22/2012 - Harrison Ford Chuckles To Self Upon Realizing He Hasn't Been In Movie People Liked In 18 Years
5/22/2012 - First McDonald's Opens With A Young Grimace Just Starting Out As A Cashier
5/22/2012 - Karzai Thanks U.S. Taxpayers For Covering Cost Of War
5/22/2012 - Couple Has Nest Egg Of Debt To Make Sure They've Got Some Money To Owe Down The Road
5/22/2012 - Computer Hacker Denied Access To Social Life
5/21/2012 - Cool Basketball Fan Calls Sport 'B-Ball'
5/21/2012 - Study Logs 2,000 Wrongful Convictions
5/21/2012 - News Team 9 Adventures
5/21/2012 - Alabama School System's Lone Textbook Falling Apart
5/21/2012 - Every NBC Program To End With Character Straight Up Asking Viewers What Kind Of New TV Shows They Would Like To See
5/21/2012 - Donna Summer Dead
5/21/2012 - The Week In Pictures
5/21/2012 - Deadly Imports
5/21/2012 - Behind The Pen: The Chinese Threat
5/21/2012 - Meth Lab Tests Confirm Dealer's Hypothesis
5/20/2012 - The Skeet Shooter
5/20/2012 - Jessica Tanley and Rodney Holl
5/20/2012 - Independent Baking Scene Apparently Worth A Documentary
5/20/2012 - Yankees To Rest Pitching Mound After 8 Innings Of CC Sabathia
5/19/2012 - Jubilant Rangers Throw Skates Into Stands
5/19/2012 - Pushy Hermit Crab Girlfriend Wants To Move In
5/19/2012 - Sculpture Of Stereotypical Italian Chef Proof Of Pizzeria’s High Standard Of Excellence
5/19/2012 - Metta World Peace
5/19/2012 - Fleet Of Ambulances On Hand For 41-Year-Olds' Touch Football Game
5/18/2012 - Dying Chevron Executive Excited To One Day Become Oil
5/18/2012 - The Return Of Eddie
5/18/2012 - Baseball Officials Concerned As More And More Retired Players Begin To Show Jose Canseco–Like Symptoms
5/18/2012 - Sweetener Makes You Dumber
5/18/2012 - Famous Flops In Sports
5/18/2012 - That One Kid In High School Who Had A Hearing Aid: We Check And See How Bad His Hearing Is Now
5/18/2012 - Alien Still Hasn't Gotten Around To Listening To Whole Voyager Golden Record
5/18/2012 - New DVR Can Skip Ads
5/18/2012 - Heat Lose Chris Bosh Indefinitely To Severe Poetic Justice
5/18/2012 - Local Man Shot With Girly Pistol
5/18/2012 - On Manchester City’s First Title Since 1968
5/17/2012 - Bears Claim They'd Want Brandon Marshall On Their Side In Bar Fight With Woman
5/17/2012 - Kristen Anderson and James Greene
5/17/2012 - Evolution Of Obama's Gay Marriage Stance
5/17/2012 - Republicans Stalling Obama's Agenda By Speaking, Moving In Slow Motion
5/17/2012 - Cop Grudgingly Admits Suspect Is The Best Goddamn Pedophile He's Seen In 30 Years On The Force
5/17/2012 - Nonwhite Babies Pass White Babies In United States
5/17/2012 - Top Names For Skrillex's Haircut
5/17/2012 - Bush Endorses Romney
5/17/2012 - Secretary Of Transportation Flips Out On Pothole In Baltimore
5/17/2012 - German Luftwaffle Chain Offers Waffles, Overwhelming Air Superiority
5/16/2012 - Lady Gaga Barred From Indonesia
5/16/2012 - Swedish Rules Football
5/16/2012 - After Weeks Of Media Pressure, Shia LaBeouf Still Refusing To Have Public Meltdown
5/16/2012 - Area Man Pretty Shaken Up After Running Into Casual Acquaintance At CVS
5/16/2012 - First Private Flight To Space Station This Week
5/16/2012 - Tens Of Thousands Dead In Ongoing Africa
5/16/2012 - County Fair Judges Blown Away By Local Heifer
5/15/2012 - James Palmenteri and Valerie Skinner
5/15/2012 - Stranded Fisherman Sues Cruise Line
5/15/2012 - Alabama Hosts First Desegregated Mass Suicide
5/15/2012 - Derek Jeter Admits He Only Plays The Game The Right Way For The Pussy
5/15/2012 - I Was One Of Those Kids Who Always Took Cats Apart To See How They Worked
5/15/2012 - Your Horoscopes – Week of May 15, 2012
5/15/2012 - Positive Affirmation Makes One Feel Worse
5/15/2012 - Hershey's Announces It's All Out Of Candy
5/15/2012 - Bicycle-Riding Circus Bear Pedals Back To Natural Habitat
5/15/2012 - Same Homeless Man Always Begging For Change On United Flight
5/14/2012 - Holmes On Homes
5/14/2012 - Optimism
5/14/2012 - Don't You Fret, America
5/14/2012 - Tiger Woods' Reputation Takes Another Hit After He Is Caught Operating A Coal Mine With Flagrant Disregard For OSHA Regulations
5/14/2012 - 'Avengers' Has Record Second Weekend
5/14/2012 - Holy Matri-Money
5/14/2012 - Behind The Pen: How Marriage Works
5/14/2012 - Was Romney A Bully?
5/14/2012 - 'Game Of Thrones' Running Out Of Unkempt Old Men To Cast
5/14/2012 - The Week In Pictures
5/14/2012 - General Mills Gives Honey Nut Cheerios Bee Intense Backstory Of Childhood Foster Home Abuse In Bizarre Rebranding Effort
5/14/2012 - JPMorgan Loses $2 Billion
5/14/2012 - Authorities Place Alabama Residents In Foster State
5/13/2012 - Marilyn Helms, 91, knows you're looking at her age and thinking, "She lived long enough." Well, fuck you.
5/13/2012 - Prince Fielder Urges Rookie To Choke Up On Burrito
5/13/2012 - Big Brown Attempts Horse Racing Comeback As Jockey
5/13/2012 - Cliffhanger High
5/13/2012 - New Poultry Stripe Gum Hardly Tastes Like Goose After Chewing For One Minute
5/13/2012 - Guitar Music Fad Runs Course
5/12/2012 - Goodell's Toughest Rulings
5/12/2012 - Police Continue Investigation Into Body Found At Churchill Downs By Questioning Horse Of Interest
5/12/2012 - $80 Million Movie Scrapped After Footage Reveals Brad Pitt Had Spinach Stuck In Teeth For Entire Film
5/12/2012 - 5-Year-Old Announces Circle No Longer Her Favorite Shape
5/11/2012 - Not The New York Philharmonic
5/11/2012 - Tony Parker
5/11/2012 - On Pujols' First Home Run
5/11/2012 - Roger Goodell Tells Junior Seau's Family To Throw Brain In His Trunk With The Rest Of Them
5/11/2012 - Santorum Now Viciously Condemning Homosexuals, Minorities, Women For $100,000 Speaking Fee
5/11/2012 - Gray Wolves Sighted In Capitol Building For First Time In 85 Years
5/11/2012 - Is This The Perfect Elbow?
5/11/2012 - North Pacific Experiences Waste Surge
5/11/2012 - Kentucky Derby Winner Hoping He Won't Have To Repeat What Was Easily Most Traumatic Experience Of Life
5/11/2012 - Aviator's Marriage On Autopilot
5/10/2012 - Mike Abramson, 33, sure showed all of you when he died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound Tuesday night.
5/10/2012 - Brain Surgery Live Tweeted
5/10/2012 - What Are We Running Out Of?
5/10/2012 - Disney Reveals That Every Disney Movie Takes Place In Single, Unified Universe
5/10/2012 - Gingrich Drops Out Of Presidential Race
5/10/2012 - Ahmadinejad Kind Of Getting Back Into Old R.E.M. Again
5/10/2012 - Dogs' Thoughts 'Read' With MRI
5/10/2012 - Nation's Moms Invent New Recreational Drug To Worry About
5/10/2012 - Environment-Friendly Hollywood Achieves 91 Percent Recycled Content
5/9/2012 - My Future Postman
5/9/2012 - North Carolina Bans Gay Marriage
5/9/2012 - Fracking Industry Now Largest Employer Of Recent PR Graduates
5/9/2012 - Consumer Borrowing Increases In March
5/9/2012 - Obama Blasts Obama's Evasive Stance On Gay Marriage
5/9/2012 - Stigmatic Teen Says His Miracle Is Gross
5/8/2012 - John Daniels died from laughing so hard his heart fell out his butt.
5/8/2012 - Loophole In Curse Lets Archaeologist Off The Hook
5/8/2012 - Smoove Is Remodeling
5/8/2012 - Steve Nash Has Emotional Goodbye With Host Family
5/8/2012 - Maurice Sendak Dead At 83
5/8/2012 - This Week In History: Sears Tower Constructed With Bold Challenge To God Engraved On Roof (1972)
5/8/2012 - Your Horoscopes – Week of May 8, 2012
5/8/2012 - Film 'Neighborhood Watch' Gets Name Change
5/8/2012 - Maya Angelou Thought She’d Be Invited To More White House Stuff
5/8/2012 - FDA Approves Napalm Breast Implants
5/7/2012 - Mundane Sex
5/7/2012 - It Easy To Tell What Area Man Will Look Like As Skeleton
5/7/2012 - Greeks Reject Bailout-Supporting Politicians
5/7/2012 - Rajon Rondo: 'I Have Too Many Father Figures On This Team'
5/7/2012 - In Bipartisan Spirit, Obama Makes Deal To Get Kicked In Balls
5/7/2012 - Ashton Kutcher Ad Pulled Amid Charges Of Racism
5/7/2012 - College Graduation
5/7/2012 - The Week In Pictures
5/7/2012 - Inaugural Paula Deen .05K Walk For Diabetes Research Course Map
5/7/2012 - Paula Deen Sponsors .05K Walk For Diabetes Research
5/7/2012 - 'Supermoon' Biggest Of 2012
5/7/2012 - Study: 72 Percent Of All High-Fives Unwarranted
5/6/2012 - This Is Fun, Right?
5/6/2012 - Deep, Inherent Sadness Of Favorite Bar Overlooked
5/6/2012 - Rex Grossman Happy To Take An Afternoon To Teach Robert Griffin III Everything He Knows
5/6/2012 - Justice Breyer Unable To Look At Anything Without Deliberating Constitutionality Of It
5/6/2012 - On The Nets' Really Plain Logo
5/5/2012 - Robert Griffin III
5/5/2012 - Mohamed Sanu Very Disappointed To Discover Second Call From Bengals Not A Prank
5/5/2012 - Half A Sleeve Of Oreos Lost In House Fire
5/4/2012 - Following Death Of Adam Yauch, Grieving China Frees Tibet
5/4/2012 - NFL Draft Winners And Losers
5/4/2012 - Prince William, Kate Middleton Celebrate One-Year Anniversary By Forcing Humiliated Servants To Disrobe, Kiss Each Other
5/4/2012 - The Top 100 Companies That Aren't Hiring Right Now But Will Keep Your Information On File
5/4/2012 - Derrick Rose To Writhe In Pain On Floor For Remainder Of NBA Playoffs
5/4/2012 - Mosquitoes Don't Even Need To Bite Us, Study Shows
5/4/2012 - DEA Forgets Man In Cell For 4 Days
5/4/2012 - The Dandelion Gang
5/4/2012 - Jacksonville 3rd-Round Pick Punter Bryan Anger: 'I Will Punt The Jaguars To Greatness'
5/4/2012 - Scientists Discover 6,000-Year-Old Stain
5/3/2012 - Condo With All The Finest Craigslist Keywords!
5/3/2012 - How Was Philadelphia?
5/3/2012 - Longtime Teacher Retires Without Changing A Single Student's Life
5/3/2012 - 'The Scream' Sells For $119.9 Million
5/3/2012 - Cops Cleared On Corruption Charges After Implicating Decorated Police Dog
5/3/2012 - Remembering Dick Clark
5/3/2012 - Murdoch Blasted As Not Fit To Lead
5/3/2012 - Thing With Old Girlfriend Works With New Girlfriend
5/3/2012 - Obama Asks Staff To Try To Include National Security Adviser A Little More
5/3/2012 - Popular 'Dad' Character Will Leave Next Season
5/2/2012 - Operation Repo
5/2/2012 - Medium Channels The Spirits Of Old Acquaintances For Awkward Small Talk
5/2/2012 - Jessica Simpson Has Baby
5/2/2012 - Secret Service's Prostitution Scandal Did Not Affect President's Security, White House Adviser Madame Chartreuse Says
5/2/2012 - Wind Farms Cause Local Warming
5/2/2012 - Anxiety-Ridden Man Rightly Ashamed Of Every Single Thing He Does
5/2/2012 - Cat General Says War On String May Be Unwinnable
5/1/2012 - Occupy Calls For General Strike
5/1/2012 - Grizzlies Annoyed They Went To Bed Instead Of Watching Clippers Improbable Comeback
5/1/2012 - An Entomologist's Dream!
5/1/2012 - Some Engineer Currently Designing Better ESPN Telestrator Instead Of Surgical Equipment
5/1/2012 - New Visa Talking Credit Card Urges Buyers To Go For It
5/1/2012 - Your Horoscopes – Week of May 1, 2012
5/1/2012 - As Long As My Child Does Something That Makes Him Happy And Wins The National Book Critics Circle Award For Fiction, I’ll Be Proud
5/1/2012 - Tourist Ban In Dutch Pot Cafés Upheld
5/1/2012 - Romney Courts Hispanic Vote With Animated Sombrero-Wearing Parrot
5/1/2012 - Man Being Dragged By Bus Leaves Hilarious Phone Message