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2016 May
5/31/2016 - How To Combat Signs Of Aging
5/31/2016 - Strongside/Weakside: Kevin Durant
5/31/2016 - Facebook, Twitter Helping EU Combat Hate Speech
5/31/2016 - Library Of Congress Adds ‘No Sleep ’Til Hammersmith’ To National Motörhead Registry
5/31/2016 - Lululemon Executives Furious After Focus Group Leaves Product Testing With Self-Esteem Intact
5/31/2016 - The TSA’s Plans For Improvement
5/31/2016 - Doomsday Clock Pushed To One Minute To Midnight After Arby’s Threatens Launch Of 3-Cheese Jalapeño Beef ’N Bacon Melt
5/31/2016 - Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 31, 2016
5/31/2016 - God Admits Stealing Idea For Messiah From Zoroastrianism
5/31/2016 - Anti-Choice Groups Targeting Women Via Smartphones
5/30/2016 - The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 30, 2016
5/30/2016 - ‘Keurig For Pot’ In The Works
5/27/2016 - How Companies Are Appealing To Millennials
5/27/2016 - Elton John, Vladimir Putin Cancel Meeting
5/27/2016 - Coworker Loudly Typing Away Like 1930s Cub Reporter Chasing Hot Lead
5/27/2016 - Helpful Museum Map Highlights Exhibits Visitors Don’t Have To Feel Too Bad About Skipping
5/27/2016 - Nation’s Overthinkers Convene To Determine What That’s Supposed To Mean
5/27/2016 - Enraged Character In Stageplay To Be Unconvincingly Restrained By Other Actors
5/27/2016 - Number Of Millennials Living At Home Reaches 130-Year High
5/27/2016 - Brazen Man Leaves Copy Of ‘Consent To Kill’ By Vince Flynn Unattended In Coffee Shop While Going To Bathroom
5/26/2016 - Furious Steve Kerr Throws Spine Onto Court To Protest Foul Call
5/26/2016 - Tips For Saving Money
5/26/2016 - Report: 70% Of Trump Endorsements Made After Staring At Bedroom Ceiling For 4 Hours
5/26/2016 - Most Americans Avoid Clinical Trials
5/26/2016 - Voyager Probe Badly Damaged After Smashing Into End Of Universe
5/26/2016 - Family Chooses Different Dog Than Reincarnated Grandfather
5/26/2016 - Man Forced To Venture Pretty Far Into Wilds Of Internet To Have Opinion Confirmed
5/26/2016 - Korean Ice Cream Bar Combats Hangovers
5/25/2016 - A Breakdown Of Wedding Costs
5/25/2016 - Angelina Jolie Becomes College Professor
5/25/2016 - Knocked-Out Secret Service Agents Wake To Realize Jimmy Carter Loose
5/25/2016 - Leaked Documents Reveal Studio Executives Knew About ‘Gods Of Egypt’ Before It Released Onto Public
5/25/2016 - Friends, Family Admit They Expected Man’s Mental Breakdown To Look Completely Different
5/25/2016 - Books Vs. E-Readers
5/25/2016 - Squid, Octopus Populations On The Rise
5/25/2016 - Man’s Garbage To Have Much More Significant Effect On Planet Than He Will
5/25/2016 - Ice Machine Reaches Deep Within Itself To Give Man One More Cube
5/24/2016 - Tips For Successful Fundraising
5/24/2016 - Adults Born Premature Have Lower Income, Fewer Partners
5/24/2016 - How To Teach Your Children Money Management
5/24/2016 - Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 24, 2016
5/24/2016 - Nation Unable To Recall If Trump Said He’d Personally Fund Abortion Bombings Or If That Just Sounds Right
5/24/2016 - If I Could Be Just Completely Honest For A Second, I Believe Exactly What You Believe
5/24/2016 - Female WWII Pilots To Be Buried At Arlington
5/23/2016 - Best Ways To Deal With Smartphone Addiction
5/23/2016 - The Arguments For And Against Bernie Sanders Staying In The Race
5/23/2016 - Balloons Trigger White House Lockdown
5/23/2016 - Family Knows Not To Interrupt Dad While He’s Skimming Pool, Listening To Orioles Radio Broadcast
5/23/2016 - Report: Nobody Fucking Cares
5/23/2016 - Mom Sleeps In Past Sunrise
5/23/2016 - Man Googling ‘Tender Lump On Neck’ About To Begin Exciting New Phase In Life
5/23/2016 - Tyrannical Drinktator
5/23/2016 - The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 23, 2016
5/23/2016 - Native Americans Not Offended By Redskins Name
5/20/2016 - Google’s ‘Human Flypaper’ Would Protect Pedestrians
5/20/2016 - Hillary Clinton Sets Personal Single Rep Squat Record While Watching Bernie Sanders On Gym TV
5/20/2016 - Family Thought Grandfather Might Enjoy Watching Worst Little League Game Imaginable
5/20/2016 - Nation Dreading Next 6 Months Of Watching Candidates Trying To Relate To It
5/20/2016 - Biden Quietly Asks Obama To Pick Him Up Some Of Those Real Throwing Stars From Japan
5/20/2016 - Summer Will Set New Record For Air Travel
5/20/2016 - Military Apologizes After Drone Strike Intended For Yemeni ISIS Base Accidentally Hits West Palm Beach Wedding
5/20/2016 - That’s My Wife!
5/19/2016 - California Eases Water Restrictions
5/19/2016 - Facebook Clarifies Site Not Intended To Be Users’ Primary Information Source
5/19/2016 - Heroic Police Officer Talks Man Down From Edge Of Purchasing Subway Footlong Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki
5/19/2016 - Widower Just Doesn’t Have Energy To Waltz With Dead Wife’s Dress Tonight
5/19/2016 - Heart Attack A Real Wake-Up Call For Man’s Insurance Provider
5/19/2016 - Area Dad Needs More Time With Museum Plaque
5/19/2016 - J.K. Rowling Defends Trump’s Free Speech
5/19/2016 - Tips For First Date Conversation
5/18/2016 - Judge Orders Desegregation Of Mississippi School
5/18/2016 - Dad Locks Into Elaborate Chess Match With Lawn Mower Salesman
5/18/2016 - How To Prepare A Will
5/18/2016 - ‘Look At All The Tiny Houses,’ Whispers Trump As Jet Reaches 10,000 Feet
5/18/2016 - Wealthy Socialite Falling For Unrefined But Beautiful Lower-Class Populace
5/18/2016 - British Royals Launch Mental Health Initiative
5/18/2016 - Supposed ‘Game Of Thrones’ Buff Hasn’t Even Finished Books Yet
5/17/2016 - Ayahuasca Shaman Dreading Another Week Of Guiding Tech CEOs To Spiritual Oneness
5/17/2016 - NBA To Display Advertisements On Jerseys
5/17/2016 - Cover Letter Writing Tips
5/17/2016 - Quick Question: What Am I Supposed To Be Doing Right Now?
5/17/2016 - Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 17, 2016
5/17/2016 - Pfizer Blocks Use Of Drugs In Executions
5/17/2016 - On Line Consultant
5/16/2016 - Woman Had No Idea Participating In 5K Walk Could Be So Unrewarding
5/16/2016 - Florida Sinkhole Reveals Prehistoric Fossils
5/16/2016 - Mom Wants To Know If The People Who Live In Your Apartment Building Are Nice
5/16/2016 - New Audubon Report Finds 78% Of Female Birds Sexually Harassed By Stranger Exposing Colorful Plumage
5/16/2016 - Senator From Troubled Home State Repeatedly Acting Out In Congress
5/16/2016 - The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 16, 2016
5/16/2016 - Mobile App To Revolutionize Way Users Waste Time, Money
5/16/2016 - 2-Hour Meeting Spent Thinking Up Hashtag Absolutely Nobody On Planet Earth Will Ever Use
5/16/2016 - Disney Begins Uploading Obama’s Consciousness To Hall Of Presidents Robot
5/16/2016 - ‘Frozen’ Fans Demand Gay Character
5/14/2016 - Signature Wedding Cocktail Provides Guests With Another Thing To Quietly Make Fun Of
5/13/2016 - Home Improvement Tips
5/13/2016 - George Zimmerman Auctions Off Gun Used To Kill Trayvon Martin
5/13/2016 - Aging Succubus Lowering Standards For Men Ever Since She Turned 40,000
5/13/2016 - Friend From College Wasted No Time Becoming White-Collar Professional
5/13/2016 - Trump Sits Down Beside Fire With Quill And Ink For Evening Writing Out Tweets
5/13/2016 - Obama To Visit Hiroshima
5/12/2016 - Tips For Staying In Touch With Friends
5/12/2016 - Google Proposes Professional Female Emoji
5/12/2016 - Big-Box Stores Vs. Small Businesses
5/12/2016 - Waitress Who Took Over At Table Just Doesn’t Have Same Spark As Richard
5/12/2016 - ‘Second Skin’ Could Make Wrinkles Disappear
5/11/2016 - Donald Trump’s Campaign: Myth Vs. Fact
5/11/2016 - Summer Concert Style Tips
5/11/2016 - Biologists Discover Billions Of Missing Bees Living Anonymously In Sacramento
5/11/2016 - Krispy Kreme Sold For $1.35 Billion
5/11/2016 - Tim Duncan Sternly Reminds Spurs About Maximum Occupancy Limit Of Locker Room
5/11/2016 - U.S. Loses U.N. Membership After Soapy Bo Obama Jumps Up On Secretary-General
5/11/2016 - Teacher Empathy Improves Learning
5/10/2016 - Arguments For And Against Capital Punishment
5/10/2016 - A Timeline Of Transgender Rights In America
5/10/2016 - Donald Trump Rift Not What Paul Ryan Needed In Middle Of 14-Day Cleanse
5/10/2016 - Study: Average Person’s Life Plan Can Only Withstand 25 Seconds Of Direct Questioning
5/10/2016 - Mysterious Benefactor Leaves Coupon Book To Dozens Of Local Establishments In Man’s Mailbox
5/10/2016 - Deep Voices Evolved To Scare Enemies
5/10/2016 - Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 10, 2016
5/10/2016 - Carson Wentz Hoping To Just Skip To Part Where He’s Respected Veteran Backup QB
5/10/2016 - Herpes Administered To Invasive Fish
5/9/2016 - Poll Finds Many Voters Would Support Equally Unlikable Third-Party Candidate
5/9/2016 - NYC Protects Pregnant Women’s Right To Drink
5/9/2016 - How Colleges Are Luring Top Students
5/9/2016 - Michael Phelps’ Fiancée Gives Birth To Healthy 6-Pound Tadpole
5/9/2016 - I Would Die 2 Know
5/9/2016 - Teary-Eyed Student Loan Officers Proudly Watch As $200,000 Asset Graduates From College
5/9/2016 - Parents’ Password A Grotesque Combination Of Children’s Names, Birthdays
5/9/2016 - Popular New Dating App Just List Of 20 Attractive Singles To Repeatedly Scroll Through
5/9/2016 - The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 9, 2016
5/9/2016 - Chinese Astronomers Inform Beijing Residents Sky Will Be Visible For Rare 2-Minute Window Tomorrow Morning
5/9/2016 - Medical Error Among Leading Causes Of Death
5/7/2016 - Unregistered Horses Meet Under Cover Of Darkness For Kentucky Street Derby
5/6/2016 - ‘Bang, Bang,’ Bored White House Sniper Whispers To Self With Random Tourist’s Head In Crosshairs
5/6/2016 - Report: More Companies Offering Paid Maternity Leave To Mothers Who Complete 3 Months Of Work Ahead Of Time
5/6/2016 - ISIS Starting To Worry New Recruit Huge Psycho
5/6/2016 - Texas To Execute Death Row Inmates With New 3-Drug Molotov Cocktail
5/6/2016 - Christ Does Soft Return To Gauge Interest
5/6/2016 - ‘Project Include’ Tackling Tech’s Diversity Issues
5/5/2016 - Tips For Hosting A Pool Party
5/5/2016 - Poll: Teens Addicted To Smartphones
5/5/2016 - Budget Travel Tips
5/5/2016 - Republican Establishment Quietly Relieved Party No Longer Their Responsibility
5/5/2016 - Trump Supporter Still Planning On Rioting At National Convention Anyway
5/5/2016 - Busy Obama Sends Drone To Pick Up Sasha From School
5/5/2016 - 13-Year-Old Excited To Learn Unemployed Older Brother Forced To Move Back Home After College
5/5/2016 - The Onion Reviews ‘Captain America: Civil War’
5/5/2016 - Kennedy Space Center Displays Suit Worn By Buzz Aldrin While Lobbying For NASA Funding
5/5/2016 - ‘Hamilton’ Sweeps Tony Nominations
5/5/2016 - Conclusion Of Draft Marks Last Time Coach To Ever Scrutinize Player’s Character
5/5/2016 - Journalism Style Tips
5/4/2016 - Tour Guide Always Builds In 10 Minutes For Everyone In Group To Mount Cannon Like Horse
5/4/2016 - Best Extracurricular Activities For Kids
5/4/2016 - Nation Was Kind Of Hoping For Different Outcome When Concerned Citizens Came Together To Make Voices Heard
5/4/2016 - Cruz, Kasich Exit Race
5/4/2016 - Report: Well, Here We Go
5/4/2016 - Lone Ant Crawling Through Kitchen Trumpets Arrival Of Horde
5/4/2016 - Assault Rifle In Iraq Losing Track Of How Many Times It’s Switched Sides During War
5/4/2016 - Senator Can’t Believe He Has To Come In On A Wednesday
5/4/2016 - Woman Sues Starbucks Over Amount Of Ice In Drinks
5/3/2016 - Thousands Of Cheering Americans Packed Into Park For Ted Cruz Concession Speech
5/3/2016 - Tips For Living Longer
5/3/2016 - Couple Spends Morning At Farmers Market Verbalizing Everything That Comes Into Field Of Vision
5/3/2016 - Iconic Iwo Jima Photo Under Investigation
5/3/2016 - Ted Cruz Dressed For Campaign Rally By Swarm Of Loyal Vermin
5/3/2016 - Facebook’s Plans For The Future
5/3/2016 - Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 3, 2016
5/3/2016 - Malia Obama Selects Harvard, Opts For Gap Year
5/3/2016 - Woman Deriving Some Sort Of Sick Pleasure From Healthy New Diet, Lifestyle
5/2/2016 - Ways To Boost Office Morale
5/2/2016 - Playground Injuries On The Rise
5/2/2016 - Premier League On Leicester City Title: ‘Order Will Soon Be Restored’
5/2/2016 - Extra Leicester Police Being Deployed To Join In With Celebrating Leicester City Fans After Title Win
5/2/2016 - Disappointing Prince Vaults Found To Contain 37,000 Hours Of Billy Joel Covers
5/2/2016 - The Pros And Cons Of Taking A Gap Year
5/2/2016 - God Loses Pouch Filled With Crystals That Give Him Powers
5/2/2016 - The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 2, 2016
5/2/2016 - Phillie Phanatic Inducted Into Italian American Sports Hall Of Fame
5/2/2016 - Report: 750,000 Americans Die Each Year During First Attempt To Get Back In Shape
5/2/2016 - University Criticized For Cheerleading Posters