For decades, there’s been one question that’s tortured gamers of all ages and stripes: How did the original team of developers behind Goldeneye 007 make out? Well, after a robust inquiry put forth by our investigative journalism unit, we at OGN are happy to confirm that the creators of one of the most influential first-person shooters in history all have robust savings accounts and can comfortably provide for their families.
You can all finally sleep easy, gamers.
Our reporters have verified that the graphics artists, level designers, and art directors responsible for one of the Nintendo 64’s defining titles have achieved career stability and are all making a good living. They can properly care for their spouses and children, as well as indulge in the occasional splurge from time to time. So, take a deep breath and relax, gamers, all right?
We know you’ve all been kept up at night, tossing and turning as you worried about the fates of the artists who designed Oddjob’s hat or animated Baron Samedi. Are they living paycheck to paycheck? Struggling to make payments on their mortgages? Homeless? Fear not, because our sources confirmed they are securely making ends meet and have generous 401(k) plans for when they choose to retire. And on top of that, they all have enough saved up to send their kids to college one day.
See? It’s all good, gamers.
It was certainly an unpleasant notion to entertain, the idea that these immensely talented character artists and production managers had limited options for in-network healthcare providers and struggled to find free time to pursue their personal passions, but we now definitively know that is not the case. It’s time to put these anxieties to bed once and for all and enjoy life again.
And before you all start worrying yourselves once more, take a chill; the creators behind Superman 64 are currently bankrupt and mostly live on the street! Woo-hoo!