BEND, OR—As he excitedly slapped a teammate on the back after delivering a pinpoint 30-yard throw in practice,…
SPARTANBURG, SC—Friends and relatives were reportedly making predictions about the new baby’s sporting prospects…
SAN ANTONIO, TX—Coming clean about his off-the-court exploits during his 19 years in the NBA, former San Antonio…
NAMPA, ID—Stewing with anxiety and unable to sleep while fretting over what he was capable of, local fantasy…
ESTERO, FL—Calling the recent signing of Tom Brady “exciting as long as it goes better than last time,” Hertz CEO…
BATON ROUGE, LA—Calling it a harmless fib to fit in and let him do his job without distraction, former Notre Dame…
LOS ANGELES—Blasting them for the constant noise while his team was trying to deliver their lines, Baker Mayfield…
LOS ANGELES—Attacking the Chicago Bulls legend for his “massively overrated” line reads, Scottie Pippen boasted…
SAN FRANCISCO—Shouting over each other as guest Philip Rivers sat in awkward silence, ESPN2’s ManningCast devolved…
GREEN BAY, WI—Lashing out at those who had criticized his decision to refuse the Covid-19 shot, a defiant Aaron…
ORLANDO, FL—Hailing the product as a way users can get a piece of real-life action, retired NFL player Warren Sapp…
ARLINGTON, TX—Revealing hundreds of humiliating and bigoted messages wired by the Cowboys owner last century, The…
REDWOOD CITY, CA—Touting it as the most realistic update to their long running “Franchise Mode,” EA Sports revealed…
CUDDEBACKVILLE, NY—Estimating that the rule change had been made at least five seasons ago, local fantasy football…
HARLEM, NY—In a surprise appearance that sent local spectators into a frenzy, reports confirmed that seven-time…
NEW ORLEANS—Breathing heavily after the long run returning the chew toy to the 27-year-old quarterback, local dog…
LOS ANGELES—Returning home from Tokyo as the most decorated female swimmer in history, seven-time Olympic gold…
TOKYO—Staring in wonderment as the Olympic Village, stadiums, and surrounding cityscape collapsed in upon…
LOS ANGELES—Anxiously stirring in his chair as the barber was interrupted once again, barbershop customer Jerry…
LA VISTA, NE—In a stunning display of self-delusional and outright ignorance, local kindergartner Mia Gaughan told…