BERKELEY, CA—Eagerly speculating over who will make up the roster of controversial public intellectuals, students at the University of California, Berkeley told reporters Thursday they were excited to see the slate of notable speakers who will be disinvited to campus this year. “Man, I can’t wait to see which political figures will be invited to campus by various student groups and then forbidden from speaking due mass public outcry,” said sophomore Juliette Hadley, adding that it’s always a thrill to learn which academics and pundits will be refused a platform after the administration caves to the demands of enraged campus activists. “A big thing that attracted me to this school is all of the prominent speakers who are forced to call off their lectures due to safety concerns. One of the best benefits of attending college is being exposed to a diversity of methods for shutting down debate.” At press time, Hadley expressed disappointment after the university decided to just play it safe and not invite anyone to campus this year.

Advertisement