Study Finds White Meat Just As Bad As Red Meat

Contradicting the long-held belief on the relative healthiness of meats like poultry, a new study found that white meat raises an individual’s cholesterol just as rapidly as red meat. What do you think?

“But at least it’s the good kind of unhealthy, right?”

Jon-Paul Levy • Unemployed

“That settles it—I’m just eating everything I see from now on.”

Cecil Dickinson • Fashion Guru

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“Just point to the animal you want me to eat, and goddamnit, I’ll eat it!”

Walter Williams • Grunge Historian

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