GLASTONBURY, CT—Expressing his indifference to the matter as long as they found a spot where they were comfortable, chill substitute teacher Nick Durgen told an eighth-grade classroom Tuesday that they could hide wherever they wanted in the event of a school shooting. “If you’re not in your assigned spot for a security lockdown, that’s cool, just make sure you keep the noise down to a reasonable level,” said Durgen, who added that because he wasn’t familiar with Barterfeld Middle School’s active shooter protocols, he would probably just put on a movie if there were a gunman roaming the hallways and murdering as many people as he could find. “Really, as long as you stay quiet enough that you don’t get me into any trouble by attracting the attention of a heavily armed killer on a terrifying rampage, we should get along just fine. Oh, and no need to call me Mr. Durgen, either—Nick is just fine. However, if there’s a shooting, you may want to remember my last name just in case you have to identify my body for the authorities.” Later, after gunshots had rung out and the children had sheltered in place, Durgen said that even though the all clear had yet to be given, it was all right with him if the students wanted to flee for their lives a little bit early that day.