30 Years Of Man's Life Disappear In Mysterious 'Kansas Rectangle'
CHICAGO—The so-called "Kansas rectangle," a desolate and featureless region covering 82,277 square miles in America's…
Revamped WPA To Create 50,000 New Jobs By Disassembling, Reassembling Hoover Dam
WASHINGTON—In an effort to boost the economy and promote job growth, representatives from the newly revived Works…
TMZ Dayton Bureau Catches Secondhand Furniture-Store Owner Coming Out Of All-Night Truck Stop
DAYTON, OH—The Dayton bureau of the website TMZ.com has obtained photographs of used-furniture dealer Gerry Flanagan,…
Rural South Dakotan Walks Away From First Encounter With Jewish Man, Shaken But Unharmed
SELBY, SD—According to local resident Hank Tyson's firsthand account, the 51-year-old service-shop owner was left…
8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live
'We're Getting The Hell Out Of This Sewer,' Entire Populace Reports
Texas Vows To Reclaim Title Of Most Regressive State From Arizona
AUSTIN, TX—Following a series of embarrassingly backward laws recently enacted in Arizona, Texas governor Rick Perry…
Illinois Does A Few Adult Films To Make Ends Meet
SPRINGFIELD, IL—The State of Illinois acknowledged last week that in an effort to stay afloat during the worst…
Boulder, Colorado, Named Best Place To Raise Abducted Children
BOULDER, CO—The picturesque city of Boulder once again placed first in American Living's annual tally of the nation's…
What's Going On In South Carolina?
Between the sex scandal that crippled Gov. Mark Sanford, the questionable candidacy of Democratic Senate primary winner…
Utah Fans Concerned As Jazz Break Huddle By Shouting 'Kill The Mormons'
SALT LAKE CITY—An uneasy sense of anxiety overtook the crowd at EnergySolutions Arena Sunday as fans watched a…