Dad Heartbreakingly Thinks His Connections Can Help Son Find Job
CLEVELAND—In a devastatingly sad overestimation of his influence in the professional world, local father Bruce Tenety,…
Parenting Experts Warn Screen Time Greatly Increases Risk Of Child Becoming An Influencer
SANTA ROSA, CA—In a troubling study released by the California Parenting Institute on Thursday, behavioral experts…
Man Losing Respect For Incompetent Boss Who Won’t Fire Him
BOULDER, CO—Claiming that anyone with even a little bit of pride in their company would have dismissed such a terrible…
Man Regrets Wasting Money On College After Failing To Secure Perfect Dream Life By 24
NEW YORK—Noting that his four years at Fordham University hadn’t even led to a 3,000-square-foot penthouse apartment on…
Man Crouched Inside Of Robotic Welding Arm Terrified Robot Will Eventually Take His Job
TULSA, OK—Dreading the day new technologies would emerge to render his craft obsolete, Vince Callahan, an autoworker…
Man At Job Interview Praying He Isn’t Asked About 2-Year Gap In Résumé When He Was Abducted By Aliens
ALBUQUERQUE, NM—Concerned that the span of unemployment on his résumé could be a liability during an upcoming job…
Neither Boss Nor Employee Paid Enough To Deal With Each Other
AUSTIN, TX—Simultaneously lamenting that “it’s every day with his bullshit,” both marketing analyst Evan Hall and his…
Man Pretty Sure He Could Run This Company Into Ground Way Better Than Boss
BOSTON—Saying he had no idea how someone like his supervisor got the job in the first place, local marketing strategist…
Hope Hicks Praying She Not Still In Same Shitty Job By Time She Hits 30
WASHINGTON—Saying she only had two years left to find a “real career,” White House Communications Director Hope Hicks…
Affable Detective With Healthy Personal Life Hasn’t Solved Case In Months
SHOW LOW, AZ—Describing him as a family man who always has a smile on his face, sources within the Show Low Police…
Third Desperate, Unsolicited Email To Tenuous Business Contact Should Do The Trick
LACONIA, NH—Deciding that enough time had passed since sending her previous unanswered query, local woman Enid Calhoun…
Troubling Report Finds Millions Of Americans Forced To Make Ends Meet By Getting Up And Going To Work Every Day
WASHINGTON—In a sobering new report that lays bare a hard truth about today’s economy, the U.S. Bureau of Labor…
People Think Being A Veterinarian Is Just Playing With Cute Animals All Day, But I Also Get To Kill Them
Whenever I tell people I’m a veterinarian, I see their eyes light up, and I know exactly what’s coming next: “Oh my…
Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy
Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and…
Report: Today The Day Woman Either Quits Job Or Goes Home And Watches 4 Hours Of Netflix
BOSTON—Citing her growing irritation with the tasks assigned to her and the festering sense of disdain she harbors…
Report: Getting Parents Off Back Now Accounts For 38% Of Economic Growth
EVANSTON, IL—Describing it as one of the most powerful trends driving markets nationwide, a new report released…