Jul 4News in Brief7/4/20News in Brief7/4/20Man Doing Whippet While Setting Off M-80 In Woods Behind Hardee’s Takes Moment To Reflect On How Promise Of Freedom Yet Unfulfilled
May 6News in Brief5/6/20News in Brief5/6/20Study Finds Skin Melting Off Your Hands Revealing Bones Beneath Best Indication You’re About To Have A Bad Trip
Mar 6News in Brief3/6/20News in Brief3/6/20Man Talking Big Game About Having Shroom Hookup Folds Almost Immediately Under Pressure
Dec 9Sports News In Brief12/9/19Sports News In Brief12/9/19Russian Olympic Program Denies Steroids Played Role In 8-Year-Old Gymnast Hurling Balance Beam Through Wall To Escape
Nov 26News in Brief11/26/19News in Brief11/26/19Johnson & Johnson CEO Idly Wonders How Much Money He’d Make Off National Tylenol Epidemic
Nov 25News in Brief11/25/19News in Brief11/25/19Typical American Teen Struggles To Balance Demands Of School, Pansexual Orgies, And Drug Raves
Oct 21News in Brief10/21/19News in Brief10/21/19Study Finds Medical Marijuana Effective For Treating Long-Term Pain Over Jerry Garcia’s Death
Oct 14News In Photos10/14/19News In Photos10/14/19Teen Could Go For A Big Huff Of Something Right Now
Oct 10News in Brief10/10/19News in Brief10/10/19Pfizer Unveils New Prescription Medicine To Help Adults Quit Sitting
Sep 23News in Brief9/23/19News in Brief9/23/19Regular Customer Of Sinaloa Cartel Shocked To Learn Organization Funded Death Squads
Aug 14News in Brief8/14/19News in Brief8/14/19Pete Buttigieg Charms Crowd At Iowa Truck Stop By Sampling Local Meth
Aug 13News in Brief8/13/19News in Brief8/13/19Pfizer Announces New Antidote For Slow-Acting Poison Currently Coursing Through Bodies Of Millions Of Americans
Jul 17News in Brief7/17/19News in Brief7/17/19Man Can’t Believe He Being Jailed On Drug Charge When There Are Real Criminals Out There
Jun 17 2019News in Brief6/17/19News in Brief6/17/19Dark, Sinister Underbelly Of Small Suburban Town Turns Out To Just Be Heroin Again
May 16 2019News in Brief5/16/19News in Brief5/16/19Pfizer Denies Encouraging Drug Abuse By Packaging Fentanyl With Cooking Spoon, Lighter
Apr 24 2019News in Brief4/24/19News in Brief4/24/19John Boehner Beheads Juarez Cartel Member Who Dared Muscle In On His Legal Weed Turf
