Dec 9
PORTLAND, ME—Marveling at the veritable bonanza of choices offered by his current situation, local woman Alessa…
Feb 17
Dec 17 2019
SCOTTSDALE, AZ—Appearing seemingly out of nowhere as he clutched the neatly wrapped box to his chest, area man Greg…
Oct 4 2019
WASHINGTON—Scanning for discounts in the precision weapon and early warning satellite sections, a visibly distressed…
Dec 21 2018
CHICAGO—Staring wide-eyed at the table full of unopened presents being largely ignored by guests, local man Rick…
Dec 20 2018
Dec 22 2017
HAVERHILL, MA—Doing his best to mask his disappointment that the package didn’t contain the cable-knit cashmere…
Dec 21 2017
SANTA CLARITA, CA—Intently scanning the aisles for something that might convince the children they were okay guys…
Dec 19 2017
Sep 7 2017
Jun 15 2017
The Onion presents a selection of gifts perfect for every dad just in time for Father’s Day.
May 10 2017
With Mother’s Day just around the corner, The Onion has put together a selection of gifts that any mom would love.
Dec 8 2016
Need some holiday shopping inspiration? Here are the top-selling gifts in 2016.
Dec 1 2016
CHICAGO—Noting that your sibling always mentions that she really likes hers and uses it all the time, your mother…
Nov 1 2016
LEXINGTON, MA—Conjuring the item into existence along with several sheets of perfectly coordinated tissue paper,…
May 8 2015
FOX CHAPEL, PA—Asserting that the gesture would mean a lot more coming from all of them, local unemployed man Jeff…