According to Johns Hopkins University data, about out of every 500 Americans have died from coronavirus since the…
GAINESVILLE, FL—Promising to let him know as soon as something becomes available, nurse Janae Howager informed a man…
WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital,…
Officials have closed areas around Lake Tahoe after discovering chipmunks infected with Bubonic plague, a disease…
CANTON, MS—Calling the likely FDA approval of the Covid-19 vaccine an important first step, local vaccine skeptic…
JACKSONVILLE, FL—Awaking with a jolt to the sound of the enraged virus rampaging around his kitchen, local man Chris…
HUNTSVILLE, AL—In an effort to make it through a long day with nothing to do, bored vaccination worker Ray Gately…
ATLANTA—Admitting that she was caught off guard by the resurgent threat, CDC director Rochelle Wolensky expressed…
All athletes will be required to thoroughly wash their hands once before attending the games.
SAVANNAH, GA—Completely oblivious of the implications of her body’s positioning, Rebecca Branagan, 30, reportedly…
LONDON—Having prepared for months to make its mark at this year’s Olympics, coronavirus variant B.1.525—a U.K.…
WASHINGTON—In an attempt to address persistent hesitancy about being inoculated, the White House announced a new…
COLUMBUS, OH—Stressing that the powerful jet of red fluid emitting from her genitals was nothing to be embarrassed…
Birth control is used by over half of women in the U.S., yet there are many misconceptions surrounding it. The Onion…
Russia claims to have registered the world’s first coronavirus vaccine for animals in an effort to protect…
POWELL, OH—Deciding to take the rest of the day off to recover, local sedentary man Clay Broderman was reportedly…
With a significant portion of Americans indicating opposition to getting a coronavirus vaccine, debate has risen…
ATLANTA—Stressing that no normal person would even do such a thing at this stage in the ongoing crisis, the Centers…