NEW YORKâFollowing a social media post in which the rapper appeared to distance himself from politics, Americans nationwide commented that âKanye West must be back on his medsâ in what, technically speaking, could be called a conversation about mental illness. âThat guy was always a wack job, but itâs good heâs takingâŚ
ATHENS, GAâExplaining that the behavior provided multiple mental health benefits, a team of top therapists at the University of Georgiaâs Department of Psychology issued a statement Monday recommending treating people like shit if youâre having a bad day. âWe would strongly advise anyone who finds themselves feelingâŚ
FAIRFAX, VAâExpressing immense gratitude for their role in normalizing and promoting the pursuits of marginalized people, the National Alliance on Mental Illness issued a statement Thursday praising the National Rifle Association for decreasing the stigma around mentally ill people acquiring firearms. âThere are stillâŚ
WASHINGTONâAs part of their ongoing mission to keep their classifications updated with the most recent available findings, the American Psychiatric Association announced Thursday the supplemental addition of âObsessive Categorization of Mental Conditionsâ to the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical ManualâŚ
HOBOKEN, NJâShining new light on the words that offered you comfort just moments ago, a report released Monday found that your therapist was actually only saying that to make you feel better. According to sources, the debilitating self-hatred you feel is based in real problems you should address immediately, and itâsâŚ
YPSILANTI, MIâPreparing to bear the brunt of the lonely winter vacation, a 10-pack of Swiss Miss hot chocolate was reportedly bracing itself Monday to shoulder the burden of holding together local man Josh Hesfordâs depressing holiday alone. âOkay, itâs just me and him for the holidays, but donât worry, you got this,ââŚ
NEW YORKâSaying that even the most upbeat tunes could bring one down under the right conditions, newly single sources told reporters Monday that any song can be sad if it has sad memories attached to it. âSometimes the songs that used to make you the happiest are now the songs that hurt most, you know?â said a tearyâŚ
CHICAGOâSaying the desserts had begun to seem increasingly ominous, coworkers of Angela Shankman told reporters Thursday that their initial excitement had shifted to concern after their colleague brought baked goods into the office for the fourth consecutive day. âDonât get me wrong, I love coming to work to findâŚ
WASHINGTONâAlarmed by the sudden change in his thinking and behavior, White House aides said Tuesday that they were concerned about President Trumpâs declining mental health after he admitted he may not be an omnipotent living god. âThe president has always been completely clearheaded about his status as the supremeâŚ
GRAND RAPIDS, MIâFeeling vulnerable in the wake of yesterdayâs mass shooting in Las Vegas, local man Greg Farley was reportedly worried Tuesday that any crazy person could get their hands on a congressional seat. âItâs terrifying to think that House and Senate seats can be obtained by pretty much any maniac who meetsâŚ
WASHINGTONâWarning that the problem was even more widespread than previous studies had indicated, a new report published Tuesday in the journal American Psychologist found that one in five Americans struggle with properly masking depression. âAccording to our research, roughly 20 percent of the population has troubleâŚ
WASHINGTONâCarefully maneuvering to avoid blocking his view of the television, White House aides were reportedly called upon Tuesday to clip the toenails and wash the hair of the bedsore-ridden, incoherently mumbling President Trump as he entered his 155th straight hour of watching cable news. âItâs important toâŚ
MUSKOGEE, OKâHalfheartedly ripping at the fabric from an armrest, depressed local cat Harvey on Monday was reportedly just going the motions of destroying a couch. According to sources, the American shorthair that has been listlessly raking deep claw marks into most of the couchâs visible surface has been feeling aâŚ
WASHINGTONâSaying the method yields positive results almost immediately, a coalition of leading therapists said Thursday that most of the personal issues people experience could be resolved if they would simply stop being so weird all the time.
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