Dirk Nowitzki Shatters Backboard Glass With Powerful Soprano Singing Voice
DALLAS—Bringing spectators to their feet with a stunning display of showmanship, Dallas Mavericks power forward Dirk…
Knicks Confident They Have The Cap Space To Ruin 2 Or 3 Promising Careers
NEW YORK—Insisting that he could easily lure several free agents into giving up their hopes for a championship, Knicks…
LeBron And Lakers Hoping Horrible Series Of Failed Betrayals Brings Them Closer As Team
LOS ANGELES—Responding to a tumultuous trade deadline that saw most of the roster floated for potential deals, LeBron…
Adam Silver Sends League-Wide Memo Just Asking Players Where The Fuck They Want To Play
NEW YORK—In response to a litany of high-profile trades and a general sense of dissatisfaction from many star players,…
NBA Ref Petrified After Seeing Depiction Of Own Death While Looking Under Replay Hood
SAN ANTONIO—Staring into the distance with his mouth agape and sweat beading on his forehead, NBA referee JB Derosa was…
Original Voice Of NBA Buzzer Passes Away
SCOTTSDALE, AZ—After a lifetime spent defining the sound of basketball in America, Roman Sullivan, the original voice…
LeBron James Crestfallen After Learning L.A. Doesn’t Have Any Rock And Roll Museums
LOS ANGELES—Disappointed that his new home lacked Cleveland’s amazing variety of cultural institutions, Lakers power…
Carmelo Thinking He Would Be Good Fit On Team With GM Who Hasn’t Been Paying Attention Last Few Years
NEW YORK—In an effort to make the biggest impact possible in his 17th season, Carmelo Anthony revealed Tuesday that he…
NFL, NBA, MLB, NHL Team Owners Vote To Unionize
NEW YORK—Sending a message that they would no longer stand for dismissive treatment and inflated payrolls, owners from…
Cavs Hoping To Avoid Game 4
CLEVELAND—Frustrated after a string of demoralizing losses to their perennial championship rivals the Golden State…
Rockets’ Mop Guy Can Tell This Game Going To Be A Sweaty One
HOUSTON—Assessing the perspiration dripping off the players while waiting for the next time-out, the Houston Rockets’…