WASHINGTONâCausing dread and consternation among significant swaths of registered voters, a series of Reuters-Ipsos polls released Tuesday increased fears that the 2018 midterm elections will be won by a wave of politicians. âRight now, many Americans are worried that the 2018 elections could be an absolute landslideâŚ
NASHVILLE, TNâMotivating the masses to participate in the democratic process with her popular Instagram post, pop star Taylor Swift reportedly inspired 200 million fans from all over the country this week to register to vote in Tennessee. âTaylor hasnât really talked much about politics over the course of her career,âŚ
MIDDLEBURY, VTâFollowing in the hallowed and time-honored civic footsteps of their forefathers, Middlebury town council members continued the 242-year tradition of American democracy Monday with 4-1 vote in favor of rezoning a residential lot to accommodate a new Popeyes Chicken franchise. âIâm always happy to supportâŚ
PARISâWaiting in anticipation of the meeting between U.S. president Donald Trump and North Korean supreme leader Kim Jong-un, dozens of world leaders reportedly expressed hope Monday that the Singapore summit would lead to North Korea becoming a normal impoverished country they donât have to think about. âI think IâŚ
WASHINGTONâStruggling as they were handcuffed and removed from their homes, three American citizens recently freed from North Korea were sent back to Pyongyang Thursday after denuclearization talks between Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un fell through. âUnfortunately, so long as the aforementioned Nuclear Summit remainsâŚ
WASHINGTONâWith the Trump probe constantly preoccupying more and more of the special investigatorâs mind, Robert Mueller has reportedly forced his wife this week to dye her hair and dress in expensive jewelry and designer gowns identical to those worn by Ivanka Trump. âDammit, go get a different clutch and put on theâŚ
WASHINGTONâFrantically searching desk drawers, file folders, and the soil of a potted plant, Eric and Donald Trump Jr. reportedly ransacked Special Counsel Robert Muellerâs office Tuesday in order to steal the corresponding answer key for the questions investigators planned to ask their father. âUSA Patriot NumberâŚ
Actor and activist Cynthia Nixon is mounting a progressive challenge to incumbent New York governor Andrew Cuomo in a Democratic Party primary that could have far-reaching implications nationwide. The Onion offers a side-by-side comparison of the two candidates.
MOSCOWâConfessing that her relationship with the Putin government was closer than previously disclosed, Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya admitted Friday to repeated and frequent communication with the Kremlin concerning the Trump campaignâs âunprecedented, colossal, and toweringâ ineptitude. âOn numerousâŚ
The White House Correspondentsâ Association will be holding its annual dinner on April 28, in a tradition that has happened nearly every year since 1921. The Onion presents a timeline of the biggest moments in White House Correspondentsâ Dinner history.
WASHINGTONâEmphasizing the importance of providing young people with the skills they need to make good decisions as they mature into adulthood, Vice President Mike Pence held a press conference Thursday to unveil a new campaign educating teens about the dangers of premarital eye contact. âThis new initiative willâŚ
WASHINGTONâRocking back and forth in his chair and openly weeping, a dirty, disheveled EPA administrator Scott Pruitt confessed during testimony before the House Appropriations committee Thursday that he had spent the last of his departmentâs funding weeks ago. âItâs gone, all gone, every penny of itâpoof, just likeâŚ
LOS ANGELESâExpressing concern over the fallout from several controversial tweets praising the president, Kanye Westâs publicist was reportedly worried Thursday that the rapperâs support of Donald Trump would damage his carefully crafted public image as a manic, self-absorbed lunatic. âChrist, weâve worked so hard toâŚ
WASHINGTONâTrying to help out by offering an alternative choice amid controversy over current pick Ronny Jackson, Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump pleaded with their father to nominate the G.I. Joe action figure Cobra Commander for secretary of veterans affairs. âHeâs a good, strong leader just like you, Dad, and heâsâŚ
WASHINGTONâExperiencing searing abdominal pain brought on by the healthy fare, President Trump reportedly suffered horrible indigestion Wednesday, the morning after he ate a fresh, well-prepared meal at his first state dinner. âUgh, my Godâwhy the hell did I eat all that garbage last night?â said the wincing, sweatingâŚ
WASHINGTONâZigzagging through the State Dining Room in an effort to avoid bath time, a naked Eric Trump ran through his fatherâs first state dinner Tuesday pursued by a screaming au pair, White House guests have confirmed. The official ceremony to honor visiting French president Emmanuel Macron was reportedlyâŚ
