Apr 2 2019News in Brief4/2/19News in Brief4/2/19Tucker Carlson Challenges Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez To A Date
Apr 2 2019News In Photos4/2/19News In Photos4/2/19Glowing, Cackling McConnell Levitates Above Senate After Realizing Chamber’s Rules Only Self-Imposed Mental Construct
Apr 2 2019News in Brief4/2/19News in Brief4/2/19Increasingly Cocky Bernie Sanders Announces He Won’t Take Donations Over 27 Cents
Apr 1 2019News in Brief4/1/19News in Brief4/1/19Mueller Kinda Miffed That Barr Clearly Didn’t Read His Stuff Like He Said He Would
Feb 5 2019VideoOnion Info Clips2/5/19 VideoOnion Info Clips2/5/19History Of Independent Presidential Candidates
Dec 21 2018News in Brief12/21/18News in Brief12/21/18Nation Not Sure How Many Ex-Trump Staffers It Can Safely Reabsorb
Oct 9 2018News in Brief10/9/18News in Brief10/9/18New Polls Increase Fears That Midterm Elections Will Be Won By Wave Of Politicians
Oct 9 2018News in Brief10/9/18News in Brief10/9/18Taylor Swift Inspires 200 Million Fans To Register To Vote In Tennessee
Oct 8 2018News in Brief10/8/18News in Brief10/8/18Middlebury Vermont Town Council Continues 242-Year Tradition Of American Democracy With 4-1 Vote To Rezone Lot For New Popeyes
Jun 11 2018News in Brief6/11/18News in Brief6/11/18World Leaders Hope Singapore Summit Will Lead To North Korea Becoming Normal Impoverished Country They Don’t Have To Think About
May 24 2018News in Brief5/24/18News in Brief5/24/18Americans Freed From North Korea Sent Back To Pyongyang After Denuclearization Talks Fall Through
May 2 2018News in Brief5/2/18News in Brief5/2/18Increasingly Obsessed Robert Mueller Forces Wife To Dye Hair Blond, Dress Like Ivanka
May 1 2018News in Brief5/1/18News in Brief5/1/18Trump Boys Ransack Mueller’s Office To Steal Answer Key To Questions For Their Dad
May 1 2018News In Photos5/1/18News In Photos5/1/18Suction Cup-Wearing Robert Mueller Forced To Cower Behind White House Chandelier After Trump Returns Home Earlier Than Planned
Apr 28 2018News In Photos4/28/18News In Photos4/28/18Huckabee Sanders Cuts Loose During Correspondents’ Dinner With Raucous, Carefree Frown
Apr 27 2018News in Brief4/27/18News in Brief4/27/18Russian Lawyer Admits To Repeatedly Informing Kremlin Of Trump Campaign’s Ineptitude
Apr 27 2018News in Brief4/27/18News in Brief4/27/18Pence Unveils Campaign To Educate Teens About Dangers Of Premarital Eye Contact
Apr 26 2018News in Brief4/26/18News in Brief4/26/18Dirty, Disheveled Scott Pruitt Confesses He Spent Last Of EPA Funding Weeks Ago
