Mar 25Slideshow3/25/21Slideshow3/25/21Could You Pass The U.S. Citizenship Test?While every naturalized American citizen must take the U.S. citizenship exam, only one third of American-born…
Feb 23News in Brief2/23/21News in Brief2/23/21Spirit Who Caught Typhus En Route To Siege Of Antioch Figures It Simpler Just To Say He Died In The CrusadesPERDITION—While admitting that the explanation was not technically true, 943-year-old spirit Brictric of Waddesdon…
Nov 5News In Photos11/5/20News In Photos11/5/20Conservatives Outraged After Finding Hundreds Of Votes For Trump Spray-Painted On Jewish Graves
Sep 15News in Brief9/15/20News in Brief9/15/20Conservative Evangelical Asks God To Give Her Strength To Incorporate Forced Hysterectomies Into Belief SystemCORDOVA, TN—Praying that the Lord Almighty would help her understand the recent whistleblower reports about…
Sep 4News in Brief9/4/20News in Brief9/4/20Pope Maintains Divine Buzz By Microdosing Eucharist Throughout DayVATICAN CITY—Revealing that the practice helped him reach a state of sanctifying grace, Pope Francis confirmed…
Jun 4VideoOnion Info Clips6/4/20 VideoOnion Info Clips6/4/20How Coronavirus Is Changing Religious Worship
May 5News in Brief5/5/20News in Brief5/5/20Man Feels Like He Gets Gist Of Enlightenment After First Few Minutes Of Hearing Zen Monk TalkSEATTLE—While watching a dharma talk recorded at the Ancient Mountain Zen Center, local 32-year-old Mark Davis told…
Apr 28News in Brief4/28/20News in Brief4/28/20Teleconferencing Pastor Requests Any Worshipper Currently Speaking In Tongues Go On MuteDEPEW, OK—In an effort to reduce disruptions during a prayer meeting held by teleconference Tuesday, Pastor Terry…
Apr 15News in Brief4/15/20News in Brief4/15/20Pope Francis Finally Close To Finishing BibleVATICAN CITY—Expressing surprise at how productive he had been during the pandemic, Pope Francis told reporters…
Apr 10 2020Slideshow4/10/20Slideshow4/10/207 Times We Mistook Some Random Long-Haired Guy In The Sky For JesusLast week, we were absolutely sure the Second Coming of Jesus Christ was at hand when a bearded man with long,…
Mar 9 2020News in Brief3/9/20News in Brief3/9/20Pope Francis Urges Priests To Refrain From Molesting Children Over Coronavirus FearsVATICAN CITY—Stressing that ensuring the safety of all clergy members remained the Holy See’s primary concern, Pope…
Feb 28 2020News in Brief2/28/20News in Brief2/28/20Child Doing Stations Of The Cross Reflects On Boredom Christ Must Have Felt During CrucifixionGREENVILLE, OH—Reaching a more profound understanding of what martyrdom really meant, local 12-year-old Charlie Ward…
Feb 17 2020News in Brief2/17/20News in Brief2/17/20Pope Francis Attempts To Compromise On Rule-Change Proposals By Allowing Priests To Marry HimVATICAN CITY—In an effort to find middle ground between liberal factions hoping to modernize the church and…
Feb 13 2020Infographic2/13/20Infographic2/13/20Every Question We’ve Been Dying To Answer About The ‘Final Fantasy 7’ Remake, Plus A Few Things We’d Like To Know About What Happens After We DieEver since Sony’s E3 2015 announcement, anticipation for the Final Fantasy 7 remake has been building to a fever…
Feb 5 2020News In Photos2/5/20News In Photos2/5/20Billboard Super Judgmental Since Converting To Christianity
Jan 27 2020News in Brief1/27/20News in Brief1/27/20Experts Unable To Determine Why Someone As Rich As Justin Bieber Even Needs To Believe In God AnymoreCAMBRIDGE, MA—Explaining that the evidence “simply does not add up,” experts at Harvard Divinity School told…
Dec 20 2019News in Brief12/20/19News in Brief12/20/19Prominent Evangelical Magazine Calls For Removing Trump From Holy TrinityCAROL STREAM, IL—In a scathing opinion piece published Thursday by Christianity Today, the evangelical magazine’s…
Dec 18 2019News In Photos12/18/19News In Photos12/18/19Mormon Church Accused Of Hoarding Billions In Afterlife Tax Haven