Les Moonves Doesn’t Know How He Going To Tell Wife He Didn’t Get $120 Million Bonus
NEW YORK—Saying the news would come as a big disappointment to her, former CBS chairman and CEO Les Moonves confided to…
Kavanaugh Claims He Never Committed Sexual Assault As It Will Be Defined After Future Supreme Court Case
WASHINGTON—Speaking before the Senate Judiciary Committee, Brett Kavanaugh defended himself against accusations of…
Mother Proud She Raised Type Of Person No One Would Ever Believe Would Rape Someone
COLUMBIA, SC—Satisfied that she took great pains to ensure her son met every outward description of an upstanding…
Kavanaugh Says It’s Super Embarrassing And Sad That Christine Blasey Ford Still In Love With Him
WASHINGTON—Saying the continued attention from his former flame was beginning to border on obsession, Supreme Court…
Trump Asks Why Kavanaugh Accuser Didn’t Just Immediately Request Hush Money
WASHINGTON—Questioning the actions taken by Christine Blasey Ford in the 1980s following the alleged sexual abuse by Sup…
Applicant Who Actually Faced Punishment For Sexual Assault Clearly Not Yale Material
NEW HAVEN, CT—Immediately dismissing the high school senior’s chances of acceptance after reviewing his record, Yale…
Bill Clinton Admits That Knowing What He Knows Now He Would Have Still Preyed On Women
NEW YORK—Reflecting on his past indiscretions in light of the #MeToo movement, former President Bill Clinton admitted…
Hollywood Producer Can’t Help But Think About How Much Money He Could Make Off Movie About Harvey Weinstein Scandal
LOS ANGELES—Noting the interest generated by the extensive television coverage of Harvey Weinstein’s arraignment on…
Bill Cosby Feeling Better About Retrial Now That Climate Around Sexual Assault Has Cooled Down
NORRISTOWN, PA—Expressing relief that cultural norms had finally shifted in his favor, Bill Cosby was reportedly…
Oxfam: ‘Your Donation Will Help Us Protect Impoverished Girls From Our Employees’
OXFORD, ENGLAND—International nongovernmental organization Oxfam announced a new pledge campaign Thursday requesting…
John Kelly Apologizes For Assuming Everyone Would Ignore Abuse Allegations Like They Do In Military
WASHINGTON—Amid criticism of how long he waited to terminate the employment of Rob Porter, White House Chief of Staff…